The Last Embers
by InuNak
Summary: Heralding a new age of peace and harmony after his defeat over Azula, Fire Lord Zuko believed to have finally found peace at long last. Much to his dismay, his perilous internal conflict is apparently far from over. Follow through the eyes of Zuko (and others) as he delves into his troubled past and unveils the threads of fate...
1. Chapter 1: The start of an Era

The crimson robes that clad the young Fire Lord sat uncomfortably, wrinkling heavily as he shared in the joy of a steaming hot cub of Jasmine Tea, alongside his Uncle. The air was hot, even in the open air, and it bothered him greatly. It took him a long time to acclimatise to the warm atmosphere of the Nation he had returned to, and even now it managed to take its toll on him. He sighed, resting his cup on the small table beside him as he started to fiddle with his crown piece. The pin no longer kept his raven-black hair perfectly in a knot, and needed adjustment to seem gracious once more.

"It the weight of your crown too much to bear, Lord Zuko!" Uncle Iroh offered a humerous chuckle as Zuko furrowed his brows deeply.

"I don't like it." He said after a moment's more of fiddling with the ornament. "I mean, it stings my scalp from time to time, it never seems to fit my top knot… it's becoming ridiculous."

Iroh only smiled. "Yet it suits you more than any predecessor I have seen in my life's span. Truly." He kindly remarked as he refilled his cup. "The greatest of leaders often suffer beneath the weight of their crown."

"I guess." Zuko puffed dismissively as he averted his gaze elsewhere.

"That was a compliment, Zuko."

"I know, I know…" Zuko puffed once more, returning a glance at his Uncle. "It's just- Nevermind." He looked down at his cup, and shook his head. "I'll just leave it for now. Will you be joining me tomorrow at the meeting?"

Iroh hummed at Zuko. "I'll be there to offer my counsel. How many of the Generals have been sent along with the delegation from the Earth King?"

Zuko grunted and folded his arms beneath the sleeves of his robes. "Five, and that's five more than I wished for in these times. They're-"

"Stubborn." Iroh quickly finished his nephew's sentence. "Listen, you're on the right path. You did well in your efforts to revert the damage caused in the Colonies and their neighbouring provinces."

That was true. He had spent his first year as Fire Lord organising restoration summits for the Earth Kingdom and the Water Tribes, as well as extending a hand to Aang in renovating the Air Temples, starting with the Western Air Temple. The Fire Nation's name was slowly being cleansed from its previous blamishes, caused by the now late Fire Lord Ozai and his predecessors, Azulon and Sozin.

He had also made sure the original polocies were reverted or corrected to suit a new era of peace and harmony. Along with the dismissal of Ozai's old court and the war tribunals of the upper echelon of command during the Hundred Year War, Zuko had secured his homeland and he had aquired a staff of seasoned politicians and officers to help him usher in this new era. Such as Master Jeong Jeong, who he had grown fond of after his corronation. The old Admiral was reinstated at Zuko's behest, and reluctant as he might have felt about retaking his former position he was now tasked with a restored and noble purpose of de-militarisation the troops and equipment.

He smiled gratefully at his Uncle. "I guess so. All because of you, Uncle."

"Oh, please, spare me that." Iroh waved his hand, as to silence Zuko. "You'll be off to Mai now, I take it?"

"Yeah…" Zuko jawned as he shoved his chair back to the table. "She'll be waiting for me with Izumi, hopefully. Can't blaim her if she went to bed already." He said with a cracked smile.

Mai, who was now Fire Lady of the Fire Nation at his side. Together, they had a daughter, Izumi was her name. Their first born child. He absolutely adored her, with every fibre in his body. She took after her mother mostly, apart from the fact that Izumi actually smiled. Mai had kept her more or less bored, unexpressive attitude over the time they had spent married, though she did warm when near Zuko. The regal position fitted her natural elegance almost perfectly.

She had contributed just as much as he did to restoring the world back to balance. The same was not said for Ty Lee, who had disappeared to Kyoshi Island ever since his first day as Fire Lord. No… Mai had extended a hand to overseeing the Colonies and the wellfare of the once conflicted provinces. Mai, of all people! Who knew she had it in her… At first glance, you would not have expected that from a girl like her, for sure.

Zuko bowed to his Unlce deeply before heading inside, leaving him to muse on the endless topic of teabrands and the diversity of pai-sho strategies. Zuko barely managed to hold in a grin as he made his way through the palace. It took him a good few minutes walking the corridors of the Royal Pallace to reach his chambers. He made sure not to wake Izumi as he tip-toed towards his bed. Mai, as he already suspected, was fast asleep.

He couldn't help but smile, as he reconsidered. _"I'll just let her be for a while."_ He whispered to himself as he quietly made his way to his study.

Maybe a little paperwork, then bed. It would lift the load off tomorrow's pile of work awaiting him. He grabbed the chair as he scoured his desk for leftover scrolls and messages he had not yet inspected.

Easily enough, his eyes fell fell upon one of the largest scrolls resting on the corner of his desk. It bore the seal of the Fire Sages. Filled with renewed enthusiasm, he opened the letter and eagerly started binge-reading the document.

Ever since Aang had destroyed the Temple of Avatar Roku during the Winter Solstice, the Sages had not seen fit to return to the Cresent Island. Zuko had longed for the day that the Temple was restored. He saw it as a crucial part of his heritage and as an important spiritual place for not just Aang, but future Avatars too. He had assigned a team of Fire Nation architects and earthbenders to oversee the task of rebuilding the temple to its former glory.

He smiled. He did right by his lineage. After all, Avatar Roku was his great-grandfather on his mother's side.

 _"Mother."_

There it was again. A great thorn in his side.

Ever since he remembered, he wanted nothing more but to find his mother. He had personally scoured the globe in search for his mother. Every highest mountain, every deepest ocean… to no avail. There was not a corner of the four nations where she had been found.

Reports from Ba Sing Se had been shared at his request, which revealed a description of his mother travelling with another man throughout the earth kingdom. It lead him on a bleak looking trail.

It failed.

He burried his head in his arms as he removed his headpiece and undid the sash of his outer robes. He felt the crushing weight of this constant reminder bear down on his shoulders once more. A familiar burden, come to torment his mind, like an old, faded scar acting up out of the blue from time to time.

He had done almost everything in his power to gain more knowledge, to continue the search. Uncle Iroh had visited his father in the capital city's prison, to see if Ozai would be more willing to share his knowledge on the whereabouts of his mother with his brother. All that Iroh left with was a thousand painful remarks on how big a traitor he was to the Nation, how weak he was for siding with Zuko and worst of all how he failed to be a real father to his son, Lu Ten.

No… Ozai did not seem willing enough. His resolve was strong, even now, and nothing in the world seemed to change his mind on Zuko and his 'newfound' allies. In Ozai's eyes, his life was void of purpose or drive, and this meant he had absolutely no reason to aid Zuko. There was no trade to make, no gains from the exchange, no bargain to be struck to earn his freedom. He would stay locked up for the remainder of his existance.

 _"Just as he should."_ Zuko thought with a hollow feeling of accomplishment, since it pained him greatly to think Ozai might have information he could use. No… even if he had, and there was no way of knowing he had, he could not trust him. He was dangerous. Everything he would say and do could be a trap, or a ruse, or worse…

He thumped his hand on the desk. The more he thought about the subject, the more he struggled to keep his calm.

He had numerous encounters with Aang in order to still his mind. Their meditative sessions had caused him to ease his mental struggle, but even Aang could not bring Zuko to terms on the harsh reality of the subject. He would never truly be able to accept the probability that Ursa had vanished, for good.

He pushed himself from his desk, clearly agitated with himself. "Remember what Aang taught you." He scolded himself softly beneath his breath. Breathe in, breathe out… count to ten, Zuko… find your centre, your balance.

He exhaled deeply, no longer flexing… and then, his weary eyes fell on a peculiar scroll. One he had overlooked.

He picked it up, pondering the nature of the contents as he inspected the cryptic symbols which bound the papers together.

It was from the Sun Warriors. For… him?

 _Fire Lord Zuko,_

 _Masters Ran and Shaw have blessed us with the greatest of gifts in these times of blossoming peace. We are sure their gesture of generosity will honour your rule as Fire Lord, as they have seen fit to entrust the renewed line of dragons to you. It will arrive this Thursday, we predict, at the Royal Palace._

 _May Agni light your path, Fire Lord._

He couldn't believe his eyes.

"Dragons?!"

* * *

"Can you believe it, Mai?" Zuko exclaimed as they waited in the courtyard. He had hardly slept through the night, and was so ecstatic he even skipped breakfast.

Dragons! After believing the stories for centuries that they had gone extinct, after witnessing first-hand what he believed to be the last two remaining dragons… he had not dared dream the wild possibility that the once-revered creatures would rise from the smouldering ashes.

"Yeah, it is." Mai yawned as she carelessly stretched outwards with her arms, much to Zuko's dismay. "Hey, I am glad for you, am I not?"

"Glad- Mai, this is the single-most greatest honour I've received since I-" Zuko swallowed his words as he sheepishly smiled at his wife. "O-Of course… I-I-I… I mean, I've never been more glad since the day w-we married… a-and Izumi, natu-naturally! I m-mean-" His cheeks started to flourish bright red.

Mai shook her head as she affectionally nuzzled his cheek, quickly dismantling the built-up tension within Zuko. "Just teasing, dummy. You should be happy. You have every reason to be."

Zuko dipped his head, and returned to continuously scouring the skies for any vague signs of the impending arrival of the dragons. Aang had sent him a letter too, which arrived shortly after breakfast. He had agreed to accompany their flight, along with Appa. In turn, Zuko had made sure to inform his Uncle of this great surprise too.

 _"Ooh, isn't that…" Iroh laughed as he wiped away a tear of joy. "I'm so happy… So, so happy. It is indeed the greatest of honours, Lord Zuko, that Ran and Shaw saw fit to grace you in this manner… and not to speak of the return of the dragons first and foremost!"_

He hadn't seen his Uncle this joyful in ages, not since the grand opening of his very own tea-shop. The sheer amount of emotion packed in his reaction spoke a truth that encompassed over a thousand words.

A few minutes of silence had passed, before Mai spoke to Zuko again.

"What about the meeting, anyway?" She mentioned with a dull tone highlighting her question. "Is that still going to take place?"

"Only after the arrival." Zuko replied. "This is of utmost importance… I think the delegations can wait another hour. If they haven't arrived by then…well, I guess I'll have to reschedule them for tomorrow." His tone was filled with nonchalance, as if dismissing the importance on a childish whim.

"What- No, you can't. It'll dishonour them." Mai shook her head furiously. "After all, you summoned them here for the summit."

"I know…" Zuko sighed, folding his arms behind his back. "You're right… I'll deal with them accordingly, I promise." He nodded quickly, reminding himself his crucial position on the matters at hand. The Nation would, sadly, have to come before his own personal interests, even if they were as large as… well, dragons!

"And what about your fire-bending sessions?"

Zuko dipped his head. "I think I'll be ending those soon, anyway."

Over the past few months, Zuko had almost completed his training fully, mastering the most difficult techniques of the art under the tutelage of both his uncle as Master Jeong Jeong, among a few. He had been able to ascend to the same level of expertise as his tutors, yet there was one technique that proved out of reach.

Mai folded her arms too. "I don't even know why you would want to learn such a deadly technique."

"I just…" Zuko forced back a disappointed grimass. "I just thought it would be good if I grasped the essence of lightning. It feels important that I do."

"And then what…" Mai continued. "Would you use it?"

"I don't think-" Zuko was about to answer, as Mai continued her question.

"Just like your _sister_ and _father_ did?"

A moment of silence passed before Zuko replied.

"Not like them."

"You know I don't like bringing them into a conversation."

"No…"

"And I know you don't too."

Zuko hummed as he peered back at Mai. "Do you speak with anyone about them, at all?" Mai cautiously continued, feeling the need to press her curiosity over the edge. After all, they never had any lengthy talks about Zuko's relatives, who were now safely imprisoned.

"I discussed my relationship with Ozai long ago with you and Uncle, even with Aang. You three helped me in easing my past, and understanding my future path." Zuko said ever so slowly, clenching his jaw uneasily. "I never liked it. This… image, of my father, had grown so solid in my mind, that it took ages to undo it and behold my father fully, in all his goods and bads. Goods being in the vast minority, though."

"I won't mention your mother though, I know how much that hurts you." Mai said as she rested her hand upon Zuko's shoulder. "I know you're adamant about finding her."

"Mhm." Zuko grunted deeply.

"…and… and what about Azula?"

Zuko averted his eyes from Mai's. "What about her?"

"You… still haven't seen her." Mai continued, scouring his face for any change in expression.

"No."

Mai took an almost tentative step towards Zuko. "And you still aren't planning to…?"

Zuko dipped his head again as he quietly replied. "Still not."

Mai forced Zuko's head towards her as she searched his eyes. "But why?"

Zuko shook her hold off gently, grasping Mai's hand as he turned to face her fully once more. "Let's not… discuss that."

"But -why-, Zuko." Mai insisted, her tone growing more impatient by the minute.

"Because-… I just don't want to discuss her." Zuko said sternly. "I just don't."

In truth, he underestimated almost anybody who wished to bring forth the subject of his sister. He hadn't forgotten Azula, but regarding her mental state and their past together, Zuko had felt regret. Regret and sorrow for all that had occured in the past. He felt directly responsible for her condition, in certain ways. Ways Mai or his Uncle would not understand. They would most likely disagree, and hush him as they comforted him and tell him otherwise. But he didn't want that. He never wanted that…

"Don't want to, or can't bring yourself to do it?" Mai asked. "I'm not trying to push your buttons, I'm just… trying to help you, the same way I did regarding Ozai." She hastly added as she felt Zuko trying to withdraw himself.

"I'm sorry, but you can't. Not even Iroh can, and he's been in the family longer than I, Mom or Da- _Ozai…_ have been." He puffed at her. He was right about something, after all. Time and time again it was proven he was right. No one understood Azula like he did. No one would ever see her as much more than a lunatic in a cage. Not that he could blame most people for thinking that. By Agni, even he believed that till this day. She -was- sick inside, but… he always held hope. Hope for a solution, a way to fix her. But he knew he couldn't do it, not untill she had help from others. People who knew how to handle her delicately. People who would not make _stupid_ mistakes, unlike himself. "Not to discredit you, but I think Azula is-."

His voice stopped as he suddenly felt the winds shift. His ears picked up a faint flutter in the distance, accompanied by a loud, familiar roar of the flying bison.

"They're here." He said, as they both turned their eyes towards the skies. The Imperial Fire Benders immediatly scurried into position around the courtyard as they too became aware of the impending arrival. Zuko had stationed them, just in case. Not out of hostility, but simply to safeguard the premises. The news, strangely enough, had travelled throughout the city like wildfire. Every citizen had caught ears of it, and longed to see if the rumours were true.

He couldn't blame them for their shared enthusiasm. His people were just as giddy about the sole idea of dragons like him, after all.

The shadows in the clouds started to grow bigger and bigger as the clouds themselves started to thin out more and more. The winds picked up their pace as the crimson banners decorating the walls started to flap uncontrolably. Even Zuko himself struggled as his hand reached for his robes, making sure everything stayed right where it needed to be. Mai simply held a hand in front of her bangs, making sure her hair remained in its proper shape.

A few seconds later, Aang and Appa appeared from the sky, and landed with a soft 'thud'. Aang was dressed in the traditional orange garbs of the Air Nomad monks, with decorative wooden beads depicting the four elements hanging from his sash. With a daunting hop, he landed softly on the courtyard floor, tugging the reins of Appa over the bison's horns.

"Fire Lord Zuko." He said with a bow.

"Avatar Aang." Zuko replied, as the two stared at eachother for a brief second, before laughing it up and exchanging a hug. "It's so good to see you again, Aang."

"You too… though, I think you'll be rather suprised to see what I brought with me." Aang said with a sheepish smile, as he dragged Zuko towards Appa's saddle.

"Ah, yeah!" Zuko eagerly made his way towards Appa's side. "I was beginning to wonder if they're far off, or still airborne!"

"Weeeeelll, about that…" Aang fiddled with his thumbs as Zuko's expression changed from happy to uncertain.

"They… are here, right?" Zuko asked slowly.

"Weeeeelll… first off, I know you'll be disappointed, and I'm sorry… buuuuuuuut it's just… one." Aang said, as if treading on broken egg shells, so scared to see how Zuko would react tot he news.

"N-No, that doesn't matter at all!" Zuko exclaimed. "One is more than enough, I couldn't have wished for more than one! One dragon still hails the return of their kind, and I'd be happy to just play my part in the restoration!"

"Weeeeell… there's a second part! Funny, isn't it?" Aang laughed as he hopped back onto the saddle, and messed around with something Zuko couldn't see from down there. So, Zuko, now bursting with curiosity, made his way up Appa's side to get a glance of what in Agni's name Aang was doing.

"I mean, it's not an adult, which is fine… it's, uuuhm-." Aang started as Zuko crawled over the rails of Appa's saddle.

And there it sat. A small, winged, scaled dragon, no larger than a large dog. With fiery, crimson red wings, and long, protruding whiskers and small, yet deadly fangs. It reared its head at Zuko, and huffed, as if coughing, trails of smoke flairing from its nostrils. It made Aang cough too, as the smoke hit Aang's face by accident.

"Well, uuhm- *coughs*, whadya think Zuko?!" Aang cried out enthusiastically, trying to diffuse the tension.

"It's…"

"I know it might not be what you thought it would be, raising a dragon from infant to adult… but… b-buuuuuut…"

"I-It's…"

"Zuko, really, believe me, it's also not what I expected, but-"

"It's _beautiful_!" Zuko roared as he knelt at the baby dragon's side, unbridled fascination glimmering in his golden eyes. "Does it… does it have a name yet?"

"Not that I know of, but I guess you could-"

"Druk!"

Aang paused to stare at Zuko, clearly puzzled by the choice. "Druk?"

"Yeah, Druk!" Zuko continued, fondly observing every inch of the magnificent beast . "I had the librarians dig up the old scrolls of lore concerning the dragons, and Druk was among the names of one of the eldest of dragons known to our history. So, I figured Druk would be the most suitable of names!"

Zuko couldn't hold back his gigantic smile as he extended a hand towards Druk. Druk, now adequately named by the Fire Lord, peered up at him, licking his lips as his snout carefully reached out for Zuko's palm.

Within inches of touching, a sudden burst of energy hit Zuko's palm, making him cry out in confused pain as he immediatly fell back in Appa's saddle.

"Zuko!" Aang cried out, alarmed by his screech. "What happened?!"

But Zuko couldn't hear him as soundless cries for help gurgled from his throat. His hand extended into thin air as images flooded his mind. Dark, clouded images… a blue figure, and a blue dragon… no, a blue and red dragon, circling one another… a spark of flame, no- a bonfire, giant and terrifying! He saw flashes of his mother, his father… then, Azula. He saw himself and Azula- No, he saw the dragons. There they were again, the red dragon rising from the ashes as the blue dragon plumitted back to the ground… they were hurt, badly! They were roaring, violently… such an agonising, terrible carcophany of awful roars.

His hands shot towards his ears first, then his eyes. The images returned, far more rapidly, succeeding one another. The dragons, his family, Azula, the dragons again, the blue figures, then the downfall, and repeated once more. They kept coming ceaselessly, untill it felt as if the images _melted_ together as a whole, a dreadful scene of suffering altogether.

And then darkness overtook him.

* * *

"No matter. We'll try again in a bit." The voice of his Uncle sounded as a helping hand emerged to bring Zuko back to his feet.

"Hgn- No, I'm ready now…" He gritted his teeth as he distanced himself from his Uncle, reestablishing his root and brushing off the dust from his training clothes.

"Are you sure, Zuko…" Iroh shook his head as he shook his thinger at Zuko. "Lightning requires a stillness of the mind, a degree of control over your emotion, and full, undivided attention."

"Look, I'm-." Zuko tried to start, but Iroh hastly continued. "And, added to those three points is my concern that you do not posses any of those three qualities at this particular moment in time."

" _Look!_ I'm fine, Uncle!" Zuko said bitterly as he readied himself. "We'll do it again. Trust me, I'm okay!"

Iroh hummed hesitantly, but stepped back in respect to his wishes nonetheless. He had dealt with Zuko's brash stubborness in the past, and he knew from extensive experience that once Zuko had set his mind on something, he would keep pushing himself.

He would tire himself out, sooner or later. He would only remain there, if things got out of hand. If he needed to intervene. He _always_ made sure he'd be just close enough to save him from himself.

Zuko inhaled a few times, trying to let the air flow steadily through his lungs before slowly attemping the necessary motions of his limbs. Amounting the energies around him, and guiding them from his stomach up through his arms to his fingertips. Years later, since he even learnt about redirection, he had finally gotten as far as visibly generating lightning, but… never a full blast from his hands. It always exploded in his face at the last second.

"Steady now, Zuko." His Uncle guided him by voice through the motions. "Take as much time as you need to stabilize yourself and to guide the lightning through your limbs _before_ letting it flow outwards. Treat the energies like you would a flame. It _lives_ , it _breathes,_ it _moves_."

Zuko kept repeating the circles, sweat dripping down the sides of his face as he felt his muscles starting to ache, pushing his strength to the limits. The lighting in the room became overshadowed by dark blue, paired with a crackling noise echoing back and forth between the very walls.

"You don't _control_ it, you _guide_ it. Let it seek its own pathways, its own course…" Iroh observed carefully. He feared, that Zuko might overdo it once more.

Zuko's eyes shot open, and his right hands' fingers suddenly burst forwards, his arm lunging outwards to strike down the invisible foes. With a loud cry, followed instantly by a deafening explosion, he was flung across the floor, tumbling across the dusty stone before coming to a slipping halt on his sides.

"Zuko, you have to stop this…" Iroh pleaded, slowly walking over to him as he rose from the ground. "You have to come to accept the fact that this technique is highly dangerous and cannot be mastered by all."

"You did it- Not that you aren't exceptional as a firebender, though." Zuko bit his tongue, correcting himself before throwing an unnecessary, disrespectful slur at his Uncle. "Why can't I?"

"It takes years, if not a lifetime, to properly bend lightning, Zuko." His Uncle reminded him as he helped him limp to the side of the arena. "Inner peace is the core value that allows a firebender to harness such deadly energies-"

"That, or a lifetime of amorality and shallowness." Zuko cut his Uncle off with a rather bitter comment.

"Ah yes, Ozai and Azula might have been able to bend lightning, but their focus lay elsewhere." Iroh sighed deeply, closing his eyes simultaneously. "Your focus, however, _must_ depend on a clear mind and harmony. Inner turmoil will continue to block your attempts to master the technique, untill ultimately resolved. And to be honest, Zuko…" Iroh shook his head.

"What? Spill it!" Zuko blurted out.

"With all that has happened in the past, I could not blame you." Iroh hesitantly continued, as his hand reached for Zuko's back. "Even if you _think_ you're at peace with all that once was, and all that will be… it might prove to never _fully_ be that way."

Zuko, even though partially angry, threw his head down in frustration. "So Ozai, and the entire legacy of my family will forever haunt me! Great, that so, SO AMAZING!" He roared as he fell back onto the floor, boiling with anger over his constant failure.

"Maybe not Ozai. I cannot tell, since you never visited him aside from the day of your ascent…" Iroh stroked his beard thoughtfully. "But I have a theory on where the root of your problems lie."

"With mom, yeah." Zuko snorted, shaking off the argument he had heard a thousand times over.

"Partially."

Zuko sat right up once more as his eyes dwelled towards his Uncle's gaze, his troubled mind now sparked by the unexpected comment. "What do you mean." He stated dryly.

"If I recall correctly, you never visited Azula after you sent her for capital city prison's mental ward, am I correct?"

"Yes, but-"

"And I _think_ ," Iroh continued, "That whatever occured in the past did not just play out between you, Ozai and your mother. Your sister was just as much a part of your past as them."

Zuko pondered his Uncle's words. Azula and him were always being put at odds by their father, and his mother thought of her as a deadly monster. As for himself… he knew a few certainties, chief among them the fact that _Azula ALWAYS lied_. He reminded himself throughout his life. He reminded himself the cruelties, the harm done, the sheer fact she would have him killed to gain the throne she so covetted for years…

"Zuko…" His Uncle tried to dismantle the uneasy silence that had fallen between the two.

"I'll deal with Azula." Zuko forcefully spew out each word with a small degree of personal disgust. "In time."

"And aside from your past, what of your present?" Iroh asked, raising his hands questioningly. "What of your nightmares?"

Ah, the nightmares. Zuko recalled well what occured every night since his initial contact with Druk. He had spent a lot of time with Druk, making sure the proper arrangements were made to house such a noble creature. He had fed Druk, made contact with him over and over again, went on walks with him… but…

"I don't know… I keep seeing the same things I told Aang first." Zuko's right hand reached for his nape as they ran through the strands of hair. "Always the same, yet not the same order. Sometimes the dreams focus on just the blue figures, sometimes purely on the dragons… and sometimes…" His thoughts shot towards Azula. She had appeared the most in his dreams, vividly. Visions of them together, of her alone, of him alone, of them as children… He didn't understand. Neither did Aang.

 _"I can't help you any further right now…" Aang apologised. "You should rest."_

 _"But how can I make them stop?" Zuko desperately pleaded Aang. "What if I'm going-"_

 _"You're not loosing your mind." Aang declared. "Dragons are highly spiritual beings, and the extent of their powers and intentions are outside my dominion."_

 _"What?!- You're the Avatar, for crying out loud!" Zuko shouted at him, grabbing his arm as to keep him in place next to his bed. "You're the single-most spiritual person in the universe. You -should- know!"_

 _"But I don't!" Aang pried his arm loose from Zuko's hold. "Look, I want to help you, I do, but-"_

 _"But -what-, Aang?!" Zuko cried out._

 _"But I can only interpret what you see, nothing more! I updated your Uncle and Mai on the situation, you won't be alone in this. They will help you however they can… And when the time is right, and you understand more about what you see… more than these, 'fragments'… you can come find me."_

 _"And where's that then?"_

 _"The Northern Air Temple, likely. I'll keep you updated on my whereabouts, should I change location." Aang reassured him before leaving._

"I just hope… that in time, they'll wear off." Zuko let out a huge sigh as he rose to his feet. "I can't tell you more than I already have shared with you, Uncle."

"Hrm. Just make sure to drink your tea before bed. Mai will have made a pot every evening to help ease your night's rest."

"Thank you."

"It's the least I can do!" Iroh said heartily. "After all, my greatest source of knowledge comes from tea! Did you know that-."

"I gotta go, Uncle, I'll see you soon!" Zuko hastly excused himself as he made his way out of the arena. Not the time to become a tea person. Not now, not ever!

* * *

 _ **So yeah... Hi! The very first step on the path to a new, challenging and certainly entertaining journey! First time using FanFiction as a writer's platform, and also a first time for writing A:TLA fiction. Future chapters will probably grow in size, depending on the amount of plotlines I want/need to explore/explain. The focus will heavily remain on Zuko's PoV throughout the story, with minor parts from other characters' PoV (such as Iroh, Azula and Mai as main examples).**_

 _ **I hope you enjoy reading, don't hesitate to leave a review. Most welcome!**_


	2. Chapter 2: An Unpleasant Visit

The afternoon sun shone down with a pleasant glow on Zuko's pale skin as he calmly sat in the patches of grass overlooking the newly constructed Aviary for his scaled companion. The aviary consisted of several rocky highrises, overgrown with tall mountain grass, which casted down their long shadows onto the stone terrace. It took Zuko a lengthy stroll up a few steep hillside pathways to get to the aviary each week, but it was well worth the effort. Even though he was still puzzled at the mysticism that swirled around Druk, he had grown fond of the dragon nonetheless.

"You're growing each day." He glanced over at Druk tumbling around at the farthest reaches of the terrace, struggling to catch the air under his wings. As if hearing his name being uttered, the dragon paused for a brief moment to peer over at the Fire Lord casting his stare down at him, before resuming his playful attempt at flying.

The edges of his lips curled into a weak smile as Zuko folded his hands in his lap. He preferred to continue his philosophy lessons in relative peace up here, although he could not shake off the Imperial Firebenders. Not even here. A small contingency had stationed themselves around the premises, to ensure the Fire Lord was still adequately protected.

Zuko closed his eyes, and recited the wise tennets his Uncle once passed onto him on their travels through the Earth Kingdom.

 _"Water is the element of change. The people of the Water Tribe are capable of adapting to many things."_

He often wondered, if fate had been kinder to have made him a waterbender. Maybe he would have acted far more different in the past, made the best of his choices instead of falling further into chaos. Change… no, he didn't believe it might be kinder if he was a waterbender. Change does not come naturally. It walks hand in hand with resilience, charachter building, motivation. Atleast, from a human perspective. Nature-wise, change was all around them. It always found a way… maybe part of that fact was a crooked truth that could be applied to all humans.

 _"Earth is the element of substance. The people of the Earth Kingdom are diverse and strong. They are persistant and enduring."_

Persistance. He knew first hand how perstistant he could be. He endured it all. Humiliation in the most cruel fashion, banishment by his own father, the loathesome pity from his countrymen, an eternal, shameful blamish which constantly reminded him of his past. But, he had won it all back, hadn't he? His country, his family, his _honour…_ only to realise that those weren't the rewards he needed at all. Oh, the irony…

Persistance. He knew the definition all too well.

 _"Fire is the element of power. The people of the Fire Nation have desire and will, and the energy and drive to achieve what they want."_

Power was nothing without the corresponing knowledge. His own bending proved to him the value of knowledge. Losing his raging drive to hunt Aang, he discovered a better path for himself. One that seemed limited, but in truth was limitless. Yet… deep down he argued with himself if he fitted the description of a firebender after all. Everything aligned, for he had the desire and will. He had the energy and drive to achieve what he wanted. But - _somehow_ \- he wasn't _getting_ what he wanted. Or maybe he was trying to get something he couldn't get, or maybe he was so delusional to not see what he truly wanted…?

 _"Air is the element of freedom. The Air Nomands detached themselves from wordly concerns, and they found peace and freedom…"_

Aang was an Air Nomad, and even Zuko believed Aang would never find peace in his lifetime. Sure, through Aang's efforts, the world had finally shifted back to balance. His Uncle's words on the Airbenders circled in his minds, cryptic as they were. If even an Air Nomad could not fulfill his strive for those values, what would that say about him? Freedom? Peace? How literal should he even be taking that? All indications of peace and freedom in this world only strengthened the _illusion_ of peace and freedom, and proved how _fragile_ it still was. Or had remaind, for that matter.

Zuko sighed deeply as he pinched his nose in quiet contemplation on the tennets. Each culture had a certain core value that applied to his life, and those around him, even if he didn't want to accept it. They each represented essential parts of his life: his life before his banishment, his struggle to retake what was his, his gruesome realisation, and finally what the future would bring him.

His mind lingered on the essence of firebenders for a moment, bringing his hand up to scratch his chin thoughtfully. Maybe the root of his problems, as Uncle put it, would lie in the description of his kind he learned so long ago.

He drew out his index finger, and started scribling down the characters in the dry sand in front of his robes.

"Desire and will." He spoke to himself as he finished the first set of characters. He had a few desires in his life. He had Mai, but technically he already filled his hearts desire, didn't he? And they had Izumi, which brought him great pride and joy just thinking about her. But what did he truly want? He always wanted _something_ , didn't he? Not that he thought he was a material type of person, but he always wanted something.

Something was lacking in his life, and for a moment, a hollow sense filled his body unannounced, making him shudder uncontrolably at the revolting thought. He had all the right things for all the right reasons. He had fully earned all that he wanted.

"Have I?" He peered down as he let the dry sand slip through his fingers, back onto the ground. He eyes trailed down the tiniest grains of sand untill the last few were scattered in the winds around him. What about all he had lost? Maybe his Uncle was right. His words rang true in his mind, clear as day...

 _"Even if you think you're at peace with all that once was, and all that will be… it might prove to never fully be that way."_

So the guilt of never being able to find his mother would slowly tear away at him for the remainder of his pitiful life, never being able to find peace amongst the bright future he had created with his own bare hands… And he couldn't change that fact.

Unless, he would grovel at the feet of his father, sacrifice all he stood and fought for, and put aside the wishes of the world _just_ to satisfy his own conciousness. He couldn't, and he wouldn't.

It would never fully be that way.

"Unless I find a way to make it that way." He tapped his chin.

Could he possibly find a way? His fingers slowly traced the second set of roughly drawn characters into the sand, exactly where he had wiped out the first set of characters. Energy and drive is what he needed. And he knew he hadn't lost those. Those very values were what made him who he was today.

His eyes slowly wondered back to Druk. He finally was airborne, and had circled the entire aviary a couple of times in the small span of a minute. Graciously, he glided through the air, untill ending his flight with a magnificent aerial somersault back to the ground. The very ground trembled as his claws slammed safely back onto the terrace stone, and a gush of wind blew Zuko's way as Druk folded his wings and curled up into a ball, resting his snout near the tip of his tail.

If the dragons had found a way back, so would he.

But what _did_ he want? Was the search for his mother the only thing left on his mind?

 _"Your sister was just as much a part of your past as them."_

He grunted at himself as the words forcefully entered his line of thought, a surge of frustration directed at his sibling flushing through his entire being.

Atleast there was a sad, twisted amount of certainty when it came to his mother. With his sister, there was only an endless stream of painful doubt clouding his judgement. There had been a time, where he had cared for his sister. A long forgotten time, before his grandfather's death. Before Azula endlessly tormented his every waking moment, before she reminded him that she would _always_ be better than him. Before she made him _believe_ she was better than him. And he hated her for that. He always blamed her for the lack of love and care he carried with him since the day his mother left them.

Even more surprising to him when she named him the _Hero of Ba Sing Se_ and credited him for destroying the Avatar. A move he found hard to see through. She gained absolutely nothing from it, and only granted Zuko a doorway back to his people's side and a place next to his father. He couldn't possibly fathom the alternative motives she withheld from him during that time.

"Why…" He rasped at himself with a low, saddened voice as his fingers gently rubbed the strained temples on his forehead. She never loved him, she never _wanted_ him around. She only wanted him _gone_ , and wanted father for herself. And yet, she was the one to bring him back home.

Days later, she rejoiced in the solitary dream that she would be an only child, almost killing him in a duel atop the Fire Navy's blimps outside the Western Air temple. She was willing to risk her life to see his own life ended swiftly. Though… her motives changed once more later on, or never changed in the meanwhile. Zuko's mind drifted off to recall the vivid, horrific and fragmented memories of the Agni Kai they fought on the day of her corronation. She had all the power in the whole wide world to finally ensure his life was forfeit with the simplest of strikes as he lay crippled on the floor, incapacitated from absorbing the deadly shock that would have robbed Katara of her precious life.

And yet, she didn't. Maybe her reasoning was somewhat plausible, since she chose to eliminate Katara first before ending his life. No… she knew she would easily overpower Katara during Sozin's Comet. She _knew_ her firebending would have won her the crown. It probably hinged on the fact that her delirious mind prevented her from making the right decision, didn't it? There was no plausibility or certainty in her actions.

"Argh...!" Zuko snorted at himself dissmissively, immediatly wiping away the characters drawn in the sand. There was a reason he didn't ponder these obscurities. There was no answer to be found in the depths of his troubled mind.

Maybe it was time, to bring forth the truth from his sister's lips.

 _If she even could._

* * *

 _The protruding flames washed back and forth, as if trying to seductively lick at his body. Zuko shielded his visage, trying to dim the heat scorching his face. His body stiffened, too scared to move an inch further, or perhaps too tired to continue. Zuko didn't want to look any longer. The pain started to turn from agonizing stings into a numb feeling, as if loss of control was starting to creep through his flesh and bones._

 _He could hear a thousand unfamiliar voices echo from the flames surrounding him, each blurred line more deafening than the other. He couldn't make sense of it, even though he tried his hardest to string together the strange slurs._

 _"…generations ago…"_

 _"…don't get caught!..."_

 _"…know better…. Dum-Dum!..."_

 _"…royal legacy… understanding the struggle…"_

 _"…Zuuuuuu-Zuuuuuuuu…"_

 _"STOP IT!" Zuko screamed, though there was no ear on which his helpless pleads would fall. No end would come to the noise, no end to the madness haunting him. Vague, dark faces started to emerge from the fire… or atleast, he thought he saw them emerge. He couldn't tell, everything seemed so fluid. So… alive…_

 _"…your mother…"_

 _"…Banished!...banished…. banished…"_

 _"…the battle… evil… and good…. Nature…"_

 _"….sins of… family… nation…"_

 _"….nature… balance…"_

 _"…legacy…"_

 _"…ZUUUUUUUUUUUU-"_

And with a loud, aching cry, he shot up right in bed. Panicked, he threw off the covers, as if trying to untangle himself from the horrifying reality he had so clearly partook in just seconds ago. His face… it was dripping. He could taste blood on his lips… blood and sweat. His trembing fingers reached around in the dark as muffled panting tangled with fear-filled strings of meaningless words.

"Zuko- ZUKO! It's alright- see?" He felt Mai's cold hands grasp his arm in an attempt to help him wake up. "I'm here, you're safe now!"

He shook his head, steadying his breath as his blurred vision started to fixate and clear. Mai's face slowly visualized in front of him, to his relief. His weary head slowly fell towards her, seeking comfort in the safety of her arms as a singular, trembling sigh escaped from his lips.

"This has to end, right now." Mai shushed him, as she let her arms guide Zuko's head towards his pillow. "I'm going to check on Izumi, she's crying again." She said, her voice seeping with indications of both concern as annoyance. "And I'm getting Aang back to the Fire Nation. He must be able to do _something_!"

"N-No!" Zuko grumbled, making Mai stop in her tracks. He rarely said 'no' to Mai, and when he did he always expected a heated argument to follow.

"Well, you can't _stay_ like this, Zuko!" She sneered at him as she planted her hands in the sides of her nightgown. "This is no way to live, let alone the fact that you'll be too _tired_ to run the Nation like this!"

"I get it, I-." Zuko sighed, wiping his forehead with his forearm. "I just- Give me untill tomorrow."

"And if you're still having nightmares tomorrow?" She said with a sharp tone to round off, her eyes practically shooting daggers at her husband. "What then?"

Zuko sighed, and cupped his head with his hands hopelessly. He didn't know. He didn't want to bother Aang, certainly after his assessment on his nightmares. He knew he would come though, but Zuko wanted to try and gain control over his issues on his own two feet first.

"Then, we can send Aang a letter." Zuko caved, to his great dissatisfaction. There was no fighting Mai in this. She was adamant in her decision making.

"Just hold off till tomorrow. Please."

* * *

"Azula"

He could hardly voice her name, so much emotion was packed in even thinking of it in his mind. The sheer amount of grief, sorrow, hatred and frustration that had amounted over the years bore too much to handle, yet he forced himself to speak up. He had to. For his sake, and that of his sister.

He had consulted the warden of the capital city prison prior to making his way down to her cell. His hair wore no crown piece, his regal robes discarded. He dressed as she last recalled him, during the Agni Kai. It would be more stable for her to behold him as she last remembered him. As a boy with no family, no throne, and nothing to lose. Fragile, holding on for dear life. That was the advice he was given, to diffuse the tension for Azula.

She didn't reply. He could barely see the white of her eyes glare in the dark, damp cell. Her face was obscurred by her wild, uncut hair, which trailed down either sides of her bleak cheeks. No expression could be sighted by him, and whether by choice or not he could not yet understand. She seemed nothing more than a shell, a husk which once housed the crown prinsess of a Nation. Devoid of happiness, of pride.

"Azula." Zuko said again, with a more harsh tone filling his voice.

"… _Zu-Zu…_ " That's it. There's the condescending, royal yet profoundly weak voice. She still had it in her, after all this time, even when weakened severely. "You took your time. Come to stare me down, to _remind_ yourself what you rid yourself of?"

"I-I-" He hesitated. The words that flushed into his mind did not translate to actual sentences. The picture painted before his very eyes made his intended conversational plans disappear into thin air, as if banished from the furthest reaches of his mind. Only emotions flashed before him, all the much to Azula's satisfaction. She knew him all too well.

"You're better off priding yourself by paying father a visit. Not that I'd recommend you to. I don't think he'd be in for a _royal_ reunion." She sneered softly at him, her words carefully chosen like picking the perfect poison. Poison to maim, not to kill. "But I can tell by the looks of it you never _dared_ to visit him. For the exact same reason you never came for me either."

Zuko tensed shortly, as if momentarily paralysed by her observation. He exhaled, before folding his legs and taking his seat. "I wanted to come sooner."

"Of course you did, Zu-zu." She chided him, mocking his statement, knowing it not to be true. She did not look at him, though. She kept her golden eyes straight down. "Let me guess. You couldn't." She let her lips curl ever so slightly. "Father always said I was the better of us two. He was right."

"I didn't come here to talk-" Zuko clenched his fist, trying to keep his calm, but his control over the conversation had long been relinquished to Azula. From the moment he spoke, he should have known she would assume direct control. She had a talent for that.

"You would let me believe that, wouldn't you." Each syllable was highlighted with a sharp, dark tone. "No matter, I suppose-"

"I came here for you." Zuko cut her off, somewhat attempting to regain control. His sudden burst was met with the uncanniest of smiles, one that even riled him. He had almost forgotten she was capable of doing that to him.

"Awh, dear Zu-Zu." She quipped, her eyes now glaring as they shot up to meet Zuko's. "Come to release me? How _thoughtful_ to repay the favor after all these years."

"Why did you do it." Zuko said with newfound determination. "Why."

"Do what?" Azula's eyes flashed in the dark.

"Don't play dumb. You know what." Zuko's eyes sparked as they searched hers inquisitively.

"Well, Dum-Dum," She snapped at him, clearly humoured at the sudden twist in topic. "Why do you think?" She prompted, inviting Zuko to slowly boil over by evading the question.

Zuko folded his arms, and furrowed his eyebrows. "I tried to answer that a thousand times over."

"And you figured that your _dear, sweet sister_ would have the right answer." She sneered.

"I hoped you would." His voice cracked, feeling a sense of shame wash over him. He had to organise himself, put his emotions to rest and focus on getting answers. There was no middle ground for him to hop around. Either he succeeded, or failed miserably and leave deprived once more.

Azula kept her mouth shut, obviously baiting Zuko to lash out. But he didn't, for the time being. He had grown more resilient than she expected, a flaw in her attempt to dismantle his common demeanor.

Zuko sighed deeply. "You tried to cover your own mistake up."

"Did I now?" It was the first time he heard something that remotely resembled a laugh. The last time she even showed that much emotion, she was cackling with madness after the Agni Kai. It hurt him, and granted a twisted form of pleasure to see she was in fact capable of showing signs of humanity towards him.

"Yes, you did." His tone grew more authoritive. "You made sure you wouldn't receive the blame. You knew there was a chance the Avatar would survive, and you don't _take_ chances in life."

"Considering I conquered Ba Sing Se _single-handedly_ , a fourteen year old girl, I hardly think father would punish me if he discovered the Avatar _miraculously_ survived a lightning bolt to his back." She mused, clearly pleased with her comeback.

Zuko pondered her comment for a moment. It was entirely plausible. Even Ozai would not have punished Azula for that, no. There was an undeniable truth in her explanation.

"Like you decided to _just_ bring me back home, without a reason." Zuko tried to tread carefully in the direction he was heading. He couldn't guess how Azula would respond to him, but chances had to be taken. "You, of all people!"

"You came home." She said dryly as she withdrew her wicked gaze from his. "That's what matters."

Zuko shifted uncomfortably, his patience started to wear thin. A part of him wanted to burst out in frustration, the same way he used to burst out when Iroh was still a prisoner in this very prison. But, he held his tongue. His conciousness wouldn't allow it. No matter how much he believed Azula had some grim, dark motive for letting him return, he could not bring himself to rain down on her with uncensored, unbridled emotion.

She still was so fragile, as if walking the thinnest of threads that kept the balance between sane and insane. Even though she was leaning towards the former, the latter seemed ever present, as if ready to pounce once it caught the scent of blood.

The uncomfortable pause turned into a minute. Two minutes. Three. Azula kept staring at her feet, as Zuko kept growing more uncomfortable by the minute. _"I'm not accomplishing anything here. Not for me, not for her."_ He thought quietly to himself, balling his hand into a fist as he reared his head, intending to leave. He wasn't doing her any favors by being here any longer than he need be. His very presence must have been utterly devastating for her to begin with.

"Wait." She suddenly said, a sharp tone ringing through the cell, yet strangely enough highlighted with a sense of… urgency. It made Zuko stop dead in his tracks, he was just halfway getting up.

"What." He grunted as he remained still.

"Is… Is she _here_?"

A boulder is what he tried to swallow down, that's what it felt like. Regret seemed to seep into every crevace of his now gaping body, taking full advantage of the blow that struck him with such unexpectance.

"I thought you'd know if she was." He said hoarsely, his throat clamping up. His hands were starting to tremble at the very thoughts filling his brain. He didn't know what else to tell her. Give her the satisfaction to share in his failure, like old times? Take revenge and hurt her in the most brutal of ways?

He didn't seem to need a reply.

"Y-You're… keeping her… away – you're…" All the sadistic control that her voice had held minutes before vanished in the blink of an eye, making all the room for the looming psychotic attack to take over.

"No-." Zuko couldn't find other words aside from this wavering whisper. He tried to ignore the ragged sounds of Azula drawing breath, trying to ignore the breakdown that was unfolding before him. He clenched his teeth, but it was not enough. "Azula, please…"

"She… sh-she doesn't want to… doesn't… me- I…" Azula irrationally spewed out between the ragged breaths, clamping back to the wall. It was the first time Zuko heard the rattling of her chains that bound her, that prevented her from bending. Latched together, like a straight jacket. That's why she kept so still.

"Azula, hold still." He said quietly, obviously dumbstruck at his discovery and still overflowing with regret of coming to visit her. He should have stayed back at the palace. It had done them both no good. No good at all.

"I'll come back, I pro-" He tried to lie, but too hastly was he cut off by a now boiled over Azula. Her head shot forwards, lunging at him as she shrieked.

"You never _WANTED_ to come! You're like _her_! Like the _rest!_ " She exclaimed, tears streaming down her cheeks. "No one… not you, not father, and _CERTAINLY_ not _her!"_

"Calm down, Azula, please!" Zuko tried, to no avail. He couldn't reach her, not like this.

" _HATE_ me then! It's all that…- all that you're capable of!" She twisted and turned in her shackles. "No one _LOVES_ me!" She sneered maliciously at him one last time, before collapsing to the floor. "Get out! GET OOUUUT!"

And he did. He got away as fast as he could, for he could feel his stomach turning and churning violently, and he felt his head spinning out of control. His legs almost seemed to give way, to release Zuko and let him tumble down, to forget what occured and to let the past rest, like he had done for so long now.

But he couldn't. So he didn't.

He would return soon enough.

He had to.


	3. Chapter 3: The First Strike

_A week later_

The Royal Conference room, located not far from the Flaming Throne, was more crowded than per usual. Aside from the Fire Lord himself, and his trusted Uncle, the room also held a handful of the most powerful, most influencial politicians, officers and others across the lands. There were a few Chieftains from the Northern and Southern Water Tribes, clad in deep, opal blue vests, stripped from furs and additional layers as to offer a more suitable attire for the warm climate that swirled across the Nation.

From the Earth Kingdom, a large set of emerald-green Generals had gathered together as a loose company of venerable veterans from the far corners of their empire. Chief among them was General Hu Ban, guarded by a select group of familiar Dai Li agents. He was absolutely humungous, his official armour adding to his gigantic figure. Two large padded pauldrons sat upon his broad shoulders, his round helmet hung from his neck by leather straps. Although he struck Zuko as entirely warborn, there was some small degree of grace to be found in Hu Ban, namely his perfectly groomed top knot, kept together by a thin strip of cloth and a golden pin.

And from the Air Nomads… of course Aang was present, clad in his orange and yellow monk garb. His staff, however, was settled against the wall, casting its long shade across the room. Although Aang had told Zuko he would be at the Northern Air Temple, he had taken the time to fly over to the Fire Nation to… 'address' the breaking news. Aang seemed lost in deep thought, pondering the news. Zuko tried to make eye contact with his dearest of friends, as had Iroh, yet neither of the two seemed to succeed in their attempt to do so.

Before the gathered group, laying blatantly in the sun that shone upon the wooden table, was a crucial document that had roused each and every person in the room.

"I thank you all for joining me this afternoon." Zuko begun after a long, uncomfortable silence that had held the entire room in its hold. "I know this is a decision that rests with me, but regarding the difficulty in the circumstances surrounding our current predicament, I was inclined to try and heed your most esteemed counsil." The words flowed perfectly from his tongue, as he was instructed to do so. He had to try and break it to them with utter delicacy.

"Merely a week ago, I have been to the asylum that houses the second most notorious war criminal the Hundred Year War has brought forth since its dawning." He continued tightly. "And rightly so, you all have a voice in… 'advising' me on this most troubling matter."

"We're here for you, Fire Lord." Aang addressed him cordially, adding the corresponding bow to his statement. The other officials copied him, although with significantly less enthusiasm.

Zuko took a deep breath, before mustering the courage to reach out towards the documents. "As you all know, after my sister's defeat at the closing point of the War, she was diagnosed as a severe mental patient, and was housed at a nearby mental facility that would take care of her. Princess Azula-"

"Hardly a princess." The scoffing voice of Hu Ban proclaimed, rudely cutting Zuko off midway his sentence.

"Mind your tongue!" Another voice echoed across the room.

"Mind your own, will you-"

"We're not here to trade meaningless insu-"

"HOW DARE YOU!-"

"Enough!" Zuko roared loudly across the room, making the braziers in the corners momentarily flare dangerously. He wasn't about to waste his precious time on the bickering of a bunch of miserable old fools, even less so being insulted with each growing minute. "Now then, _gentlemen_ , the Princess has been deemed invalid for a trial by a court of peers, so I _will not_ stand for any type of plea for so-called justice."

"Might I remind you…" General Hu Ban interrupted, now more timely. "That the people of Ba Sing Se still _crave_ for that trial-"

"Like I said." Zuko repeated himself slowly, throwing Hu Ban a rather heated, dark glare. "I will not stand for that."

"Then, what will you stand for, _Fire Lord_?" Hu Ban sneered, barely hiding the harsh sarcasm in his words.

"Chief Warden Shin, if you would, please." Zuko gestured the Chief Warden to take his position at the head of the table, making way hastly while handing over the documents.

Chief Warden Shin, as Zuko had come to know him over the past week, was responsible for this matter in some sorts. A rather skinny, old man in his late sixties, accompanied by a pair of frail, worn-out glasses and a hunched back.

"Over the past week, I have studied the behaviour of the Princess since the Fire Lord had graced her with his presence." Shin started to speak, laying out several key scrolls from the document across his end of the table. "Her patterns have changed. Normally, she would seclude herself from the rest of my staff, slumping back against the wall just to utter faint threats about how the late Fire Lord Ozai would burn us all to smouldering piles of ash… yet…" He paused, adjusting his glasses as he took his time. "All she does now, is _sob uncontrollably_. She continiously cries out for her brother, paired with almost incomprehensible phrases about… well, everything really!"

"And it doesn't stop there." Shin cleared his throat before someone could take the stand. "She barely eats or drinks any more. She's quite restless, and reaches out to any presence nearby at every chance she has. She even wrote notes, to Fire Lord Zuko, pleading him to come back, to talk to her. Atleast, half of her notes are like that. The other half are empty threats and insults strung together, aimed at Zuko too."

Nobody said a word. Zuko's gaze skipped from one face to the next, expectantly awaiting an outburst or two to occur. Yet nothing occured. They all seemed quite struck by Chief Warden's Shin's words, as if skipping a heartbeat synchronously. And Aang… Aang had still not said a word, much to Zuko's annoyance.

"Well?" The grooves highlighting his pained frown deepened as Zuko planted his hands frimly on the table. His composure had fallen short, regretably.

"I think our honoured guests surely are taking their time to assess the sheer dificulty this unannounced situation brings." Iroh spoke out, trying to reassure his nephew. Zuko sighed, for he knew it was Iroh's calculated attempt to still his impatience. He had pulled that off a million times over.

" _Why_ _did you visit her._ " Hu Ban's words shot coldly through the silence, masterfully meeting Zuko's impatience like a freshly sharpened knife. Of course it was paired with an equally sharp, toothy grin. Hu Ban was trying to sweep Zuko from his feet, prying at any insecurities of flaws. Zuko balled his hands into fists, feeling a sudden burst of heat boil beneath the safety of his long sleeves. He had to be careful not to inform anybody else on his frustration.

Yet, Hu Ban had lashed out at one of his most critical weak spots. Nobody needed to know about his nightmares. He didn't need to seem _weak_. No, he was Fire Lord. He had to keep posing as strong and composed. There was no room for weakness. If only his father were here, how _proud_ he would be of his line of thought. He didn't know whether to smile with irony or to weep at the sadness of the thought.

He looked at Aang for at least some form of support. Aang's eyes finally met his, but spoke a truth he wished he didn't have to accept. The same look he found in his Uncle's eyes. Thus, he shook his head reluctantly and accepted that very truth. He had to tell them _part_ of what was going on.

"I believe…" He started hoarsely, trying not to stutter at any given point. "…that although I have risen above my past and beyond to give rise to a new dawn of peace in the world, I have neglected the fact that-.. that-"

"My nephew is trying to say, that his somewhat turbulent fracture with his remaining family has had more effect on him than he previously anticipated." His Uncle stepped in, right on time, recognising Zuko was struggling to find the correct phrasing. Iroh was clever, seeing what Zuko was aiming at and lifting the idea even further without causing any unnecessary damage to Zuko's image. A lifetime spent surviving Ozai's councilmen had granted Iroh an extensive pool of experience when it came to politics. "Imagine losing your family, having to see them _rot_ in prison. Even after all the pain and damage they have caused, they still are his family."

"That may be." A feminine voice sounded, one that had been smart enough to wait out the storm. Stepping forward past her tribe members, she reared her head towards Zuko. Slender cheekbones and slim, dark eyebrows. Definitely Water Tribe, by all means, clearly derived from the wolfshead cap resting atop her head. She was known as Yao, one of the Southern Water Tribe members who had undergone quite the political rise after the War, elevating her to one of the most important members alive to govern over the icy wastelands and islands. "But there is _obviously more_ then what meets the eye." She remarked, tapping her nails on the table as her gaze scoured the young Fire Lord's face. "I wonder…"

Zuko tensed, and met her fixated gaze full-on. "I can't keep her locked up like this. Her state is deteriorating rapidly, and my presence seemingly does her well. As does her mine."

"What do you intend?"

Zuko braced himself, collecting his thoughts on complexity of his plans and the possible consequences they could bring. "I am going to allow Princess Azula more personal space and more priveledges, accompanied by frequent visits to her residence. And when the time is right, would the right circumstances and requirements allow it, I would have her move back into the Royal Palace, to-"

Before he could finish his turn, the whole room burst out at him, spewing heinous obscenities his way among with numerous loud protests. Hu Ban, however, cleverly withdrew himself to the background, acknowledging that the other attendees would finish his dirty work for him. There was no need for him to further light this fire, for it had grown into a grand combustion.

"I think he is right."

Five words that made the room tremble with confusion and disbelief, even in Zuko. All eyes slowly turned towards the source: Aang.

"Aang…" Zuko softly whispered, feeling a faint flicker of hope spark inside him. He couldn't believe it at first, but at heart he understood Aang's judgement. It was the reason Aang had kept his mouth shut in the first place. From the start, Aang _knew_ what predicament stood before Zuko, and was only concerned with Zuko's state instead of the petty interests of foreign, arrogant leaders playing at personal power struggles. Aang was only trying to help Zuko recover, not trying to undermine his life and authority.

"I think he is right." Aang nodded, confirming his statement to the attendees. "Azula may be crazy, and highly dangerous, and a war criminal at that… but, she is the last in the royal line left to rule. She is _important_ to Zuko, and the Fire Nation- No, of _utmost_ importance."

"You can't be serious…" General Hu Ban sputtered, the sudden crumbling of his entire laying bare before him. He hadn't expected Aang to judge in this particular manner.

"We are." Zuko retorted sternly, filling in where Aang had left. "I also intend to grant her moments to practise her firebending once more, moments where I will supervise her at my own discretion. Allowing her to practise her bending once more will certainly help her… 'feel' herself again. Bending, after all, is a key factor in the life of a bender, and taking that away leaves a gaping void." He added, contemplating his words moments later. He actually felt sorry for Ozai, if only for a fraction of a second. The sheer fact that one of the most powerful firebenders ever to live had his firebending taken away must have made more than a 'dent' in his mind, and would certainly leave a permanent scar. Not that he cared. Ozai was far more dangerous than Azula ever would be. Azula… Azula needed her bending back. It was part of who she once was, and who she could be, the very same way firebending used to be what Zuko was and what he was nowadays. If anything, it would soothe her stress levels.

"I-I will not _stand_ for this madness!" Hu Ban continued to whimper as rage built up in him, coarsing through his veins as he slammed his fists into the table, making one of the Dai Li agents twitch nervously. "If she can _bend_ , she can stand trial! Screw a court of peers, this is a grave insult to _all_ that have suffered during the war, and I will not bend my back over your… y-your _perverted, backdoor politics_ in order to _wiggle_ that _bitch_ back at your side-"

Zuko's patience snapped in half like a twig, and the entire room grew mute as they noticed the flames of the braziers started to grow higher, licking the walls beside them. The flames cast a glow onto the Fire Lord's face, highlighting the grooves of his scorned face.

"You _dare…._ You DARE speak out against me like that, in my _own home_ , against my _own blood_ … to think you were here to advise me on resovling the issue, not cause further strains…!" Zuko started to groan as his nails dug into the wood beneath his fingertips. His teeth gritted painfully against one another, failing in biting back the stream of words that started to flow from his mouth. "Get out." Zuko succeeded in biting back, maybe a fraction too late as he swept the documents from the table in anger. "I said… GET. OUT."

General Hu Ban spat on the floor, and before Zuko could lift a finger the Dai Li were at his side, turning towards the exit as the General and his colleagues made their way out. Yao did not seem all too pleased, yet she was cunning enough to know not to say a word. So she bowed, and took her leave alongside her kinsmen. All that were left was a fuming Zuko, alongside his Uncle, and Aang, who had interlocked his hands, thinking about what just played out in front of them.

"You're playing a seriously dangerous game, Zuko." Aang spoke up, after Zuko had taken his time to calm down. "I know you, you have put the needs of your people and the rest of the world before your own frequently, but this decision will cost you dearly."

"Aang's right." Iroh sighed deeply. "In angering the delegations, you have made way for a renewed tension between our factions. They will not forget this decision, and I am certain they will thirst for your sister's blood at every twist and turn."

"I don't care!" Zuko huffed angrily as he pushed himself away from the table, his robes whirling as he turned his back to both Iroh as Aang. "I really don't care! They are in absolutely _no position_ to judge Azula! They have no clue – not a _single clue_ – how hard it is to be in my shoes right now! Having to suffer from mental breakdowns in the middle of the night, to loose everything I once held dear, to even try and regain the one true thing I have lost since even before my banishment!" He roared in frustration, his hands shooting towards his head, a faint attempt to conceal himself.

Aang sighed, after finally lifting himself from his seat. "I have to ask though, Zuko… will she recover?"

"I don't know…" He softly snapped at Aang, not turning to face him."

"Can she change?" Aang posed again, making a tentative step towards him.

"I don't know, alright Aang?!" Zuko spat out, now turning to face Aang. The flicker of hope was shrinking again, rapidly. Aang was right to doubt the rates of succes on Azula's recovery. "Shin already informed me, the chances of reverting the damage that's so deeply infested the depths of her mind are so slim… hell, I got to try, for Agni's sake!"

Aang's hand met Zuko's shoulder, a comforting, supporting hand. Zuko shiverred, and clenched his jaw as his hands finally loosened from their lock.

"…She's my sister, Aang." Zuko whispered softly. "I owe her this much…"

* * *

 _He rubbed his eyes wearily. He was in the throne room, yet again. The flames danced bright red, casting shadows across the floor. He was standing just past the curtains that served as entry point, the Nation's insignia standing guard at his back. He wasn't dressed in his regular scarlet robes; on the contrary, he was wearing his old set of armour, with a long, flowing cloak sweeping behind him. His hands made their way up his hair towards his top knot, to find no flaming headpiece to sting his fingers. Something different sat atop his head, yet he couldn't figure out what. He moved to undo the pin, yet as he tried to the faces that sat in the gloomness of the room turned to face him, their eyes glistering with the same fiery red._

 _His hands dropped alongside his waist as his eyes narrowed down. He straightened his back, and strode forward towards the elongated war table. He already figured out this must have been another dream, yet this one was more lucid than the previous. No more brash, uncontrollable flashes of colours and sounds, this one was more vivid than ever. If even the act of inspecting himself raised alarm within the participants of his dream, he couldn't make any 'unwise' or 'irrational' decisions. He had to survive. Not only to risk bringing his dream to a swift, uncalled end, but also to uncover the deeper, hidden truth to this vision._

 _Hesitantly, he tried to sit at the far end of the table as he reached it, yet this too was met with hostiles gazes, so he moved upright, and cast his gaze towards the alternatives. All that was left was his throne, yet… he wasn't the Fire Lord in this dream. That much he knew… Was Ozai still Fire Lord? Did the dream call for him to seat himself next to his father?_

 _He saw no other option, so he climbed the stone stairs towards the seat shadowing the throne. The flames parted for him, allowing him entry. He briefly brushed himself off and folded his legs and arms, peering out over the table, awaiting the dream to continue._

 _"All rise for the Fire Lord." A gong sounded, echoing off the pilars that held the roof. The flames sizzled dangerously, as they started to shift in colour. The fiery red glow that gripped the room changed to an azure blue. The fires were more… alive, shooting upwards more unpredictable than before._

 _Zuko's breathing choked, as his eyes couldn't help but move towards the throne, frightened to behold who he knew would take place atop the throne. His entire body tensed, his heartbeat pounded like chanting drums._

 _Her raven-black hair was perfect once more, no longer the shredded mess she bore during her final moments as Princess of the Fire Nation. A more feminine variant of her father's robes hung from her shoulders, with layers of shoulderpads extending outwards. The flaming crownpiece sat high and mighty atop her head, drawing all the attention from her painted lips and golden eyes. Her nails tapped her knee as she inspected the room, like Zuko had done before. "You may sit." She waved her other hand, her sweet voice rising above the diminishing flames._

 _Zuko swallowed once, awkwardly, but he held his tongue. He needed to know more, no matter how painful or horrific this scene might seem._

 _"I have called you together, to celebrate our final, long sought after victory." She boasted fiercely. "To bring a toast on my strong lineage, and to honour those who made the era of shared prosperity possible. And of course, to rejoice in the end of the single-greatest threat to our cause."_

 _Zuko's ears peaked at her words, her voice grown thick with sadistic pride. It took him a moment to piece together the puzzle, a rather grim reward waiting to strike him with an icy, numbing realisation._

 _She was talking about Aang._

 _In this alternate universe, she had won the war. Aang wasn't able to stop Ozai, and had perished most likely. The Fire Nation had scorched the majority of the Earth Kingdom, the Airbenders were no more, and the Water Tribes would have fully capitulated after no longer standing a chance. And Azula… Azula was Fire Lord. Not him. Yet, here he was, at her side…?_

 _"It can't be…" He stuttered, full of defeat. It was exactly what he had fought against. And here, it seemed as if he helped realize his worst nightmare. Azula always lied, there had to be a catch somewhere._

 _"Would I lie to you, Zu-Zu." She leaned in near his ears, seducing him with her sweet tone. He could practically feel the radiance of her grin pierce him._

 _The flames disappeared, along with the figures within the room. All the scenery and furniture went up into thick smoke, which seeped into the lining between the black tiles. All that remained, were Azula and himself inside the throne room. He took a step away from her, feeling the need to distance himself. Not out of fear, but out of disgust. "This isn't real." He tried to remind himself._

 _"Oh, it's very real." She chided him as her claws wrapped around his breastplate, moving up towards his collar. "All… thanks… to you…" She whispered with sick glee._

 _He threw her hold off himself, turning to meet her face to face. Heat flourished throughout his body as she only clapped slowly at him. "Look at you. The disgraced prince, turned hero of the Nation. If only father was still alive to see you."_

 _So Ozai was dead in this reality. "Thanks to me?" He shook his head furiously, denying the very thought. Denying the responsibility for her actions. It couldn't have been him._

 _"Oh, but it is entirely thanks to you." She offered him a smile, her sickening aura slowly suffocating his every thought. "Don't you remember? Thanks to you, we were able to end the war. Thanks to you… the Avatar is no more!"_

 _"That's not true!" His hands clamped onto his head as he dropped to his knees._

 _"It is." She folded her arms. "You really are a dum-dum. Be proud of what you did. You chose right, after all."_

 _"I'd never choose -this-!" He roared at her, his eyes tightly held shut. He couldn't bring himself to look upon her again. He could feel her shadow towering over him, looking down with pity at him._

 _"You always chose her." The voice changed to a more venerable, deep tone. The heat of the fire around him was replaced by a more soothing cold. He heard the rustling of leaves pass by his head. He opened his eyes… his armour had made room for his old black and red robes, the same he used to travel throughout the nations. And before him, stood a man he had never met before… strangely familiar._

 _An alarming roar shrieked throughout the skies, and behind the man a pair of dragons flew up past the clouds towards the sun. He could barely make out their shape and size, let alone their colours. They both were dark blobs swirling around, miles away from where he stood. He pondered whether they were Ran and Shaw, from the Sun Warriors, but he wasn't sure. They would have seemed far elder than these two._

 _He looked back at the man before him. He recognised himself in his visage. Slender cheekbones, a kind smile, broad shoulders… even the hairline was alike. He reminded him of… of…_

 _He dropped his head immediatly, following by the corresponding greeting. "A-Avatar Roku." He stuttered, his curiosity quickly making way for respect._

 _"Great-grandfather will suffice." Roku reached out towards Zuko, his fingers gesturing him to stand up tall once more. "Walk with me."_

 _Zuko rose back to his feet, and accompanied Roku on his stroll. He still had little clue where he was… The top of a mountain? Had to be, where else would you peer down on clouds? But where this mountain was… he did not know. The soil wasn't dry and frail like most of the Fire Nation, nor was it sturdy like that of the Earth Kingdom… he was some place entirely different. And what about Roku? Why was his great-grandfather with him right now?_

 _Roku let out a long-drawn sigh as they reached a steep cliff, the two steadily coming to a halt. "I can't help but see your other great-grandfather appear everytime I look at you…" He said melancholy, much to Zuko's dimsay._

 _"I'm nothing like Sozin." He grunted, offering a frown that meant just as much surprise as it meant disappointment. "I hope you only meant by looks."_

 _"On the contrary." Roku shook his head as he lifted his index finger. "You, Zuko, are very much alike Sozin. Moreso than Sozin's sons and grandsons combined."_

 _"How can you say that?!" Zuko exclaimed, stepping away from Roku as if hurt, eyes widened at the statement._

 _"Because you both are defined by your mistakes. You both are molded from your rights and wrongs." Roku's hands folded behind his back as he looked away from Zuko. "And you both suffer from judging what truly is right or wrong, from the moment that you were brought into the world till the moment you pass on to the next."_

 _Zuko didn't react. He only ever acknowledged the fact that he descended from Sozin by blood, nothing more. But to be told by Sozin's life-long friend that he was the splitting image of the most malicious ruler ever to exist in the Fire Nation's history… it hurt him._

 _"I tell you this, Zuko, with great care." Roku continued, his eyes turned towards the skies. "Between everything that exists in the world, a balance is to be found. Sozin and I were part of the same balance, and I failed to maintain that. Were I still alive, I could have stopped Sozin's plans and prevented the Hundred Year War."_

 _Zuko's eyes turned towards the skies too. The dragons had circled the sun's outer lines since he arrived here, but with Roku's words one of them split off and glided further upwards, slowly fading away, while the other started descending towards the ground till the clouds swallowed it whole._

 _"I don't understand, Roku, I-" Zuko spoke, but as he turned to face Roku nobdy stood beside him. Roku had vanished._

 _He was alone._

* * *

"She's ready, Fire Lord."

"Good." Zuko said simply as he opened the doors to the inner sanctum of the asylum. The heavily reinforced iron doors swung open, allowing himself and his personal guard entry. The sanctum was cleared for his arrival. All the flamable materials were gone, leaving an empty courtyard behind. It suited his needs perfectly.

He undid his own robes, handing them over to the closest guards as he made his way towards the centre. Beneath his robes, he wore the same outfit he wore when visiting Azula. The very same clothes he wore during the Agni Kai with his sister. He had carefully consulted chief warden Shin on the best approach for the first of his firebending sessions with Azula. Same as before, this would leave little stress on her. It would grant her the best conditions of functioning.

Zuko nodded twice at the captain of the guard, who bellowed out to his men. "Stations! Open the doors!"

He closed his eyes, preparing himself. He heard the doors on the opposite side of the courtyard crunch violently. Through the silence, he could hear her make her way onto the scene. Light footsteps graced the floor, almost mute to his ears. _"Almost"_ he thought quietly to himself. Maybe to others, but to him they were all too distinctive.

The footsteps stopped, and he opened his eyes.

"So…" She had stopped a few paces from him, standing tall and defiant. She wore her old suit of armor, and her hair was more like her old self would have styled it. Her voice was more measured, nothing like how he had last witnessed her. That image flushed into his mind, and he forcefully managed to clear his mind once more before he became too unsettled. He needed to remain focussed. "You came back."

His eyes met hers, narrowying down as he beheld her like she used to once be. "I have." He approached her, trying to mask the grittyness in his tone.

"Oh, the _good_ and _honourable_ Zu-Zu you are…" She said childishly, prolonging her words with a crude smile. "Like always, you have no clue what you're getting yourself into."

Zuko clenched his jaw as he kept his eyes on her. "I'm giving you the chance to firebend once more. Maybe it'll help you-"

" _Help?"_ She spat out in fury. "You believe I _need_ your stupid _help_ , do you now?" She said harshly, making Zuko flinch at her outburst. "I don't believe for one second that you actually care. You haven't cared for years on end, and now you suddenly do."

"The very same way you never sent me a letter, but after one visit you suddenly can't stop _begging_ for me to come!" Zuko retaliated, his voice growing louder. "And yes, by the sound of it, you do need help!"

"Oh please!" She hissed back at him. Her slender fingers already started to form into her trademark firebending stance as her face darkened. "I never needed your help. You're the one who always needed it!"

"It's different now!" Zuko tried to cut across her, waving her off dissmissively with his hand. "You've been locked in an asylum, for Agni's sake! Why else-"

"You've always needed help!" She cried out once more, slotting in a flash of resentment for their shared past. "Not hard to figure... a traitor to your family and nation, a lifelong scar to remind yourself of your failure and disgrace." A sharp, condescending laugh escaped her lips. "Not to mention a father that doesn't even _love_ you!"

"You know… I feel sad for you." He said bitterly, lowering his head. "…I feel sad because of what kind of _monster_ you've become." He readied himself, lowering his stance and bringing his hands up. He knew he should never have said that.

He had readied himself for good reasons. Azula's eyes shot wide open, and joined by an ungodly roar, she lashed out at him, sending a wave of fire at him. The fires met his hands within seconds, yet the blue flames dissipated as he parted the wave in half. He grunted, and spun around, kicking his own stream of fire her way. She carefully sidestepped his attack, counter-attacking by burst-firing with both fingertips at him.

He dodged each blast skillfully, avoiding chances of getting burst with each step. Occasionally, he wouldm return the line of fire, sending a jet of fire from his fists her way, to no avail. Even after all her time spent behind bars, her status as prime prodigy of firebending had not diminished. She could deflect his attempts at wounding her with greater ease while keeping him pinned down at the same time. She deflected another of Zuko's blasts, jumping into the air with a somersault and unleashing a column of flame in his direction.

Zuko redirected the azure flames, bringing his right arm up in a circluar motion in order to guide the flames away from him, while bringing in his left arm to cut off the stream aimed at his body. Added to his spinning motion, he dropped his body, extending his right leg and sweeping across the stone floor, causing bright red flames to shoot outwards at Azula. She anticipated his move, she had seen it before. Zuko was heavily influenced by Iroh's teachings on breaking the roots of his opponent, and thus she avoided the hit by jumping into the air, sending a couple of short bursts his way in reply.

The sheer power behind her bending caused Zuko to slip back with each parry, adding in a matching groan as he tried to push the impending flames aside. His shoes found no solid foothold to grip, and he was forced to disengage entirely, giving Azula the initiative and space she needed to work with. In response to Zuko's defense, she let a cackle escape her as she pursued him, another series of fireballs surging towards the Fire Lord. A trail of blue fire followed her boots as she shot from side to side as Azula considered from which side to pounce at Zuko, yet she backflipped just in time as Zuko emitted a circle of fire from where he stood, the attack narrowly missing to strike its target.

Zuko panted heavily, and took a moment to breathe as Azula gracefully landed back on her feet, immediatly regaining her stance. "You have… to tell me… Azula…." He puffed as he sidestepped an incoming fireball, spinning on the balls of his feet while keeping his guard up. "Help me… understand!" He brought himself to his knee, landing his fist onto the floor as a wave of fire streamed towards Azula.

"I don't owe you any form of explanation!" She roared as she propelled herself out of harm's way. "It's you who owes me one!"

"Owh, how I chose _right_ for once in my life?!" Zuko hissed as he brought up his arms to block Azula's attack. "How I worked to bring the world _back_ instead of seeing it _burn_?!"

"You _abandoned_ us, Zuko!" Azula shrieked as she upheld a stream of fire from her intertwined fists, causing Zuko to stagger back. The imperial firebenders were on edge, seemingly cautious as they witnessed their Fire Lord struggle to maintain control in the battle. Azula's eyes hovered over them as she saw them step a little closer, yet she paid no further attention to them. "Just like-… l-like…"

Zuko's eyes grew wide, flickering with rage. "So that's it, huh? HUH?! I'm like Mom now?!" He bellowed at her, tears starting to stream down his cheeks as the fires started to sprout up from beneath, enveloping his lower body. "I've been the blame throughout my entire life, that's the only way you've ever been able to see me!"

Azula lashed out with another stream of flames, though Zuko broke her attack with ease, sending the fires towards the edges of the courtyard. "And worst of all, you've let yourself _believe_ that Mom didn't _love you!_ That's the saddest part about it all!"

"She _NEVER_ _loved me_!" Azula cried out, tears welling up in her eyes too as she shook her fist. "Did it never occur to you that she never said goodbye?! Didn't think twice before _leaving_ us?! Oh no…" Her voice started to crack painfully as years of built-up emotion started to flow from her. "She only had time for _you_! Her dear little prince!"

Zuko throat clamped shut as her words broke into his mind, echoing like a sinister ghost from the past. _'She never said goodbye'._ And Ozai, of course, would have dug his claws into her, seizing the opportunity to completely set her to his hand. From the moment Ursa had fled, Ozai had utter control over Azula, even if she didn't know it herself. "That's what _he_ wants you to believe!" Zuko growled as he fired a roundhouse kick towards her, trying to force her towards the outer edge of the courtyard. "Azula, he is pure _evil_!"

"He's my father, by Agni!" She yelled back at him, deflecting Zuko's strike while pinpoint accurately firing at his root. Her attack, though potent and accurate, broke against the wall of fire circling the Fire Lord. "He _loved_ me, he was _there for me_! That's more than what you can say for yourself!"

"So that's why you… why…" Zuko stuttered, as the flames surrounding him suddenly died out, slowly shrinking to nothingness as Zuko's arms hung down the sides of his body in defeat.

"Yes." Azula smirked, though the pain was very evidently present still on her face. "I gave you a _chance_. And you… betrayed me." She hissed at him. "Deposed me, _humiliated me._ "

"I-I…" Zuko couldn't get a hold of the situation, as the thousand pieces of the puzzle started to form a more clear image than he could have ever dreamed of. Her hatred for him, why she enjoyed torturing him, why she held any reason to kill him… and why she ever offered him his former life back. There must have existed the tiniest fraction of hope within her, hope that she could regain the family that was fractured so long ago. And Zuko would have been the first step in accomplishing that.

And he blew it.

"You turned out just _like her_." Her words blew his already shattered defenses to shreds. "Ultimately, family means _nothing_ to you!" Her eyes glared fiercely, shedding the tears she had brought forth to make room for one sole, dreadful feeling. "I don't need you- I don't need _anyone_ , especially you, Zuko!" She roared as she lunged forward sharply. The room darkened as bright blue lightning hurled towards towards the Fire Lord, bellowing throughout the room with the force of mountains cracking.

The world seemed to stop around Zuko. His eyes were temporarily blinded as intense pain flourished across his limbs, his arms struggling to redirect this immense energy that penetrated his body. The memories of their Agni Kai filled his mind, a haunting feeling crept over him. He was reliving that very moment, he felt like he was dying. It took him what seemed an eternity to stretch his arms fully, releasing the energy without being harmed too much. The electric currencies remained in his body though, making Zuko twitch and shiver uncontrollably as he tried to regain himself. His blurred vision slowly made way for reality once more.

He could hear fire in the background. He could hear the faint voices of his guardsmen come to him… was it him? He couldn't hear Azula, though he was in fact prepared for her outburst. But it didn't happen. Something else was going on…

She was being overwhelmed, under attack by his own men. He couldn't make out precisely what they were saying, but he knew she couldn't stand against them all. Not at this stage, she hadn't firebended in a long time. It brought forth the question how she possibly could have conjured such a strong lightning attack, but those were questions for later.

He felt his strength slowly return to him, but it wasn't fast enough. She was losing.

The image vividly danced before his eyes of the captain of the guard readying his palm. The words were so explicitly formed on the captain's lips, that Zuko did not need sound to understand what was going on.

They were going to kill her.

What happened next, was beyond his own comprehension entirely. Amidst the chaos whirling around him, clouding his mind, a moment of clarity sparked within him, guiding his hands without any concious command. He could feel the same energies that he had redirected mere moments ago return to his limbs, only less voilent and more contained, more balanced.

And then, he could feel it leave his body, finding its own path away from his body. He felt relieved, but on the other hand his body hungered for it to come back to him.

It all ended for him. Amidst the smoke that controlled the scene for a few powerful seconds, the face of his sister emerged. Neither of them could tell what the other was going through. Her lips did not form a cruel, calculated smile of disdain and spite, nor did they pout with a dangerous, misguiding sense of security. No… it just fell open.

What had he done?!

* * *

 ** _So yeah, hi again. Hopefully y'all had a nice X-mass and a good start to the new year! I'd thought I'd leave a few of my own sideline notes down here concerning this chapter. Dream segments will definitely play an important role as the story progresses. Any seasoned reader can immediatly tell that they are used as a type of foreshadowing. I would argue that it does and at the same time does not. The dreams Zuko undergoes will constantly warp into new forms with different events conveying key messages, but not everything he witnesses is by definition a foreshadowing._**

 ** _Aside from that, if you have any questions, feel free to ask me. Have fun, till the next chapter!_**


	4. Chapter 4: A Royal Gift

He had to figure out what it all meant.

He was paced back and forth in his own chambers. His hands gripped his wild, loose hair, trying desperately to orden his line of thought. He had been up here for hours now. Nobody could enter. Not Iroh, not even Mai and Izumi, though he had informed Mai of what happened. She was… not all too glad that he requested solitude, it raised a good amount of alarm bells on her end. She opted to take Izumi for a stroll instead, watch over their daughter as she explored the reaches of the Royal Palace.

He groaned as he forcefully swallowed back, choking down something distasteful. He could practically feel his own sanity plummit, escaping his body.

He had killed one of his own most trusted men for her. He had caused great pain and suffering, without even understanding why, for _her._ He did the unthinkable, the unacomplishable, because of _HER_.

He had spent months on end trying to conjure up lightning in the most balanced, spiritually calm state achievable. He had seasoned grandmasters of firebending instruct and watch over him. The entire world seemed incapable of helping him. But Azula could. Why? And aside from the technicalities of this… abnormality, why did he even risk his own life and men for her sake? He must've known deep down they would never dare harm the princess of the Fire Nation… wouldn't they? Maybe the circumstances tricked him into firing- No, no, all lies, filthy lies!

He cursed loudly and with a rageful cry unleashed a whip of fire across the room, smashing a table into two smouldering pieces. He knew what he had done. After years spent convincing himself that their coexistance was doomed from the start, after all the hours trying to let go of the latching memories of their past…

 _'You always chose her'._

The words came to mind, the same line Avatar Roku told him. It pained him deeply. To know that even though your own sister would go as far as kill you where you stand, yet then _dare_ kill all who would see her hurt… He just couldn't get a hold of himself.

His hands balled into fists, as his frustration came to a boiling point. His hearing suddenly rushed back to his ears as he realised his guards had rushed into the room. "Fire Lord, please! Are you alright?"

"What…?!" He snapped back, untill he saw why they had barged in. The table actually caught fire, and threatened to set the entire room ablaze. "Oh.. yeah… my apologies." He managed to force the words from his lips as he doused the flames with a single sweep of his hands.

He could sense the looks of his guards going up and down him, puzzled at their Lord. He didn't care. He was starting to grow accustomed to the feeling of disgust his men must have held for him. They all lost a dear collegue due to his… 'short-comings'. He grumbled, and strode right past them in a flash, making his way to an even more secluded part of the palace.

Making his way past the other inhabitants of the palace, he couldn't stop his mind from racing back to the troubling issues that ceaselessly tormented his conscience. What upset him equally was that another set of questions had arose, questions he knew he would not receive an answer for. In his moment of crippling weakness, without guards to protect him, Azula did not strike back. The painted image of her bewildered look, the open mouth, the pure shock in her eyes. It was unlike her, unlike any part of her that he ever saw. Not even when their mother had left had Azula shown such emotions. She was _always_ in control of anything she said and did.

He silently brushed the doors to the throne room open, to find Mai sitting on the Flaming Throne. The flames that normally lit the room were all gone, allowing a more natural glow of sunlight to illuminate the room. She was observing Izumi playing at the war table, with the most subtle of smiles. It quickly faded as she turned to face Zuko, rushing from her seat to her husband's side. Izumi didn't notice, she was far too busy having fun with the furniture and herself.

"Zuko…" She said quietly, as to not further alarm Izumi. Her hands tried to make their way to his face, as if to gently carress them, yet they only met air. Zuko turned his face from her as his eyes squinted, drawing forth a frown from Mai. "Look- Forget about it." She said as she folded her arms. "It was an _accident_ , nothing more."

"What Fire Lord kills his own servants, Mai, on _accident_." Zuko blurted out with a cracked voice. "My own household thinks I've gone mad."

"No they don't-" Mai tried to continue, if not for Zuko.

"I've seen that look countless times, Mai!" He spat back at Mai. "You know who deserved such looks and gazes, back in the day? Huh?!"

Mai didn't answer. She just gave Zuko a rather flat stare as she stood there.

"Oh, yeah, that's right! AZULA!" He exclaimed. "And that was when she _wasn't crazy_! I feel… so… bad! No, _terrible_ even!" His fingers started to tremble as his gaze fell down to his feet. "I can't look in the mirror without wondering what's happened to myself these past few weeks, I can't even comprehend matters which seem so utterly _simple_ to the rest of the world…. I feel so… _powerless_! And then there's these summits which lead to absolutely _nothing at all_ , with these scheming, rotten, filthy-"

"Zuko, please, for Izumi's sake." Mai hushed him calmly, bringing her fingers to his lips to silence him. "I know you're having a hard time, I do-"

"No you don't-"

" _Yes, I do!_ " She hissed loudly at him, jerking him back to her as he tried to turn away from her. "I'm not an idiot, I get what you're going through! But at some point you'll have to man up, confront your own actions and live up to your responsibilities, Zuko!"

"W-What?!" Zuko spat back at Mai.

"You heard me." Mai folded her arms as she looked away. "It's tough, but you shouldn't put the blame anywhere else than yourself. Constantly overthinking the issues that aren't worth your time isn't going to change what you did out there. You protected your sister, end of story."

"It's not that easy, Mai!" He shouted back at her. She wasn't being serious, was she?!

"I'm merely saying, stick to the core of the matters at hand. Don't lose yourself in the maelstrom, Zuko, keep your head high. Send out a royal apology to the family, lay your worries about politics to rest for another time, and simply stick to what you're planning to do with Azula." She grabbed his chin, and yanked it towards hers. "Listen… your safe-being is all that matters to me. Get that?"

Zuko honestly did not know what to say. Mai's point of view seemed almost too simple to be true, but her bluntness was a sign of truth. Come to think of it, she seemed to be right. He was overthinking it all. Of course, the death of one of his men could not be taken lightly, and his heart was right to go out to the man's family. But he could not change what occured.

"Just focus on Azula for now. Uncle Iroh will attend the summits in your name, and I'll make sure to assist him with that. In the meantime I'll have Izumi under my watch too." She said as she pressed a kiss to his forehead, her hands gliding down the back of his head towards his neck.

A long drawn sigh escaped Zuko's lips as he dipped his head. "I guess…" He said softly.

* * *

"Who… are you…?"

Zuko had spent his afternoon slowly making his way up to the aviary after practising his breathing lessons in solitude. After his incident with Azula he had returned to the basics of firebending, not willing to continue his studies on the more intense, complex technical forms and instead focusing on steady breathing and physical exercises. Only, what he was not prepared for was a man. To be precise, a complete stranger. Oh, including his table, and a game of Pai Sho.

The man was sitting perfectly still. Which puzzled Zuko greatly, since most people would feel rather uneasy in the company of a dragon. That line of thought brought along the next puzzling question, that of why Druk had not been alarmed by the presence of this induvidual. _'They are highly spiritual beings, dragons are.'_ Zuko thought to himself.

After another minute of silence, Zuko sighed, and sat at the table. His eyes fell upon the empty Pai Sho board. After another long minute, just when Zuko was about to get up once more, the man pulled a single tile from his sleeve, and placed it near Zuko's side of the board.

"And… this is…?" Zuko scratched the back of his head.

"This, Fire Lord, is the White Dragon. An uncommon opening move, and severely dangerous."

"I'm sorry- I think you have the wrong person." Zuko shook his head. "If my _Uncle_ thought this to be a way to take a load of my mind, you can inform him that I'm _really not interested_." Zuko folded his arms. _'When will he get the damn hint, I'm not in for Pai Sho.'_ He grumbled to himself in thought. He tried to get up, yet before he could he saw Druk form up behind him, curling himself around the two as he lay himself down. Zuko couldn't leave without trying to crawl his way up and over a dragon.

"I am known as Ganak." He introduced himself. "Your Uncle, Iroh, went out of his way to reach me. Refusing a Grand Lotus in dire need… now that is something I could not overlook."

"So… you're with the Order of the White Lotus, huh." Zuko stated. "And… _what_ are you, to be precise?"

Ganak offered a smile. "I have studied the rare forces that are present in our world, forces which originate from or are tied to the spirit world. I can only assume you've asked yourself why Druk has encircled us to while he does not even know me."

"Guru." Zuko blurted out, before clearing his throat and finding his calm once more. "You're a guru. A kind of spirit guide."

"Correct." Ganak dipped his head. "Aside from assisting you with Druk, I have come to understand that you are… 'troubled' as of late? And don't even waste your time on telling anything but the truth. Your words may be able to decieve lesser men, but your aura tells a different story."

"My aura?" Zuko frowned. "You mean you can _see_ my aura?"

"Why, of course." Ganak offered a smile as he reached for his cup of tea. "Would you like me to tell you what it looks like?"

"Be my guest. Try me." Zuko huffed sceptically.

"It's red, for starters." Ganak said, ignoring the expected eye-roll from Zuko. "Dark vermillion. It is very restless, Fire Lord. Turmoil darkens a divided mind. Yet… these waves, they encircle the pathways across your shoulder in such an interesting manner… highly uncommon."

"Look- I have no clue what you're trying to point out here." Zuko's hand waved dissmissively as his other pinched the bridge of his nose. "Citizens all across the Fire Nation could point that out-"

Ganak's hand released the teacup before making its way across the Pai Sho table, flipping the White Dragon tile onto the palm of his hand. The move was not meant to silence Zuko, yet the young Fire Lord could not help but watch with intrigue.

"Perhaps." Ganak said quietly as the tile rolled all too perfect towards the tip of his fingers. "But as I said, your words decieve where your aura cannot." The guru finished, as his hand suddenly reminded Zuko of someone. The placement of the fingers remembered him of-…

"What's on the… other… side of…-" His sentence would not finish as his eyes caught a glimpse of what was inscribed on the other half of that tile. "Lightning." Zuko stated blankly. His sceptisicm had brashly been replaced with no attitude or posture at all.

"I _know_ what you have done, Fire Lord, and I _know_ what troubles you. I _know_ of your nightmares, and of your pain." The scene around them suddenly darkened. Sunlight turned into shadow as the world vanished into thick mist, leaving only Zuko and Ganak in the centre of the situation. Abrupt flashes of lightning and fire sprouted from all corners as the two dragons from Zuko's nightmare seemed to whirl past them ferociously. Atop the thundering winds, Ganak spoke once more.

"There is nothing you can hide… I can see it all. Your worst fears, your darkest dreams… but… I am not here to torment you." He said, and with a wave of his hand, the world turned back to normal, just in time. Zuko had already jumped from his seat in the process.

"I am here, Fire Lord, to help you interpret these dreams." Ganak's hands folded, much like how a monk's hands would intertwine while meditating. "Not only will I help you understand Druk, but I will also guide you in transcending this world and exploring the spirit world."

"You mean… we'll be going into the spirit world?" Zuko blurted out.

"Not quite 'us', Fire Lord." Ganak chuckled shortly. "No, only you. I can show you the path ahead, but only you can walk it. I can understand the lack of confidence you undoubtably are feeling right now…" Ganak commented as he reached back to his teacup. "But truly, you have the capabilities to do so. It may not seem so, but it has been passed down to you from your great-grandfather. Those capabilities, or bonds, might fade in strength, but they continue to exist beyond the afterlife."

"So you're saying… Roku's connection to the spirit world has been passed down to me?" Zuko stuggled to string together the words. It was rather a lot to comprehend in such a short span of time.

"Precisely. And just like how Avatar Roku has reached out to you, so will you have to reach out to him eventually."

"Can't this, like, be done _without_ him?" Zuko prompted hesitantly, offering a faint shrug at the Guru.

"No, I am afraid not. And neither can I tell you what Avatar Roku might be trying to tell you, Fire Lord." Ganak shook his head. "But I can only offer you this certainty. If you believe you can withstand or ignore these signals given to you, you are severely mistaken. For your own sake as for the sake of your _sister_ , you must try to reach Avatar Roku."

* * *

"…and regarding the exponential growth in personal mental improvement, I find confidence in the Princess' future once more. The approval for Princess Azula's probation has been filed and accepted. Her scheduled release shall be expected within the week and she will be released into the custody of the Royal household, under constant supervision of the royal guards."

"So… I'll be your little lapdog, is that it?" Azula sneered happily as Zuko rolled up the parchment clutched in his hands. He chose not to react to her jabs, and instead turned his back towards her as he faced the prison door.

"I have overseen each and every precaution and have personally seen fit to adequately provide you your accomodations within the Royal Palace. The guards have been doubled, to ensure you stay within the compound." He replied coldly as the parchment dissappeared within the layers of his robe.

"And I presume _sweet Uncle Iroh_ has taken the liberty of housing a bunch of those tea-crazy morons to keep watch around the perimiters too?" Azula's voice cut across the room.

"You could say that, yes."

"How dull, Zu-Zu." Azula smirked. "I figure you must be very _proud_ of what you are doing."

Zuko shook his head wearily as he reached for the cowl of his robe, seeking to cloak his head as he prepared to leave. He had told himself prior to his visit that this encounter would remain a formality, to make sure that Azula would be reminded that she was still a prisoner, not free from her sentence. Yet, apparantly, he wasn't ready to go. Not if Azula had a say.

"Wait-." Her slender fingers shot forward, jerking back the cowl, almost reflex-like as if she had dropped something belonging to her. The tug of his robe only caused Zuko to arch backwards, quickly adjusted by the agile Fire Lord as his hand met hers with full force, removing her grip on his cowl.

"DON'T-… don't do that. Please." His voice hastly tried to mask what damage there was done to his attempt at deception. His calm demeanor faded from Azula's eyes, which had scanned each and every pull of muscle in his face. It was all over him.

"Why the rush?" She prompted with an oversaturated playful tone. She took a step towards Zuko as her hand tried to regain a hold. All too familiarly, Zuko took a step back, maintaining the distance between him and his sister. She couldn't get too close. He had to go now.

He straightened himself as his eyes met hers. "Look- I just came to report back to you what was told to me earlier today. You're getting out." He snarled at her, managing to hold back the frustration in the tone of his voice.

Azula's eyebrows met crossly as she tapped her chin, dissatisfied with the current flow of the conversation. Zuko swallowed awkwardly. Obviously, she was mad at the fact that she couldn't decipher what had lead Zuko to react so indifferently towards her all the sudden. He could practically read her line of thought. _'No, no, Zu-Zu wouldn't be scared of me because I tried to kill him. That's too easy. He might still be a boy inside, but he is far from scared.'_

She glanced at his face, and the faintest curve of a wicked smile seemed to creep onto hers. "Oh, I get it… all too well. We both know it. The difference is… you're trying to deny it."

Zuko halted in his steps towards the door, planting his hand on the cold iron as he halted. "Deny -what-, excactly?"

"Well…" She started as she encroached slowly onto Zuko, moving circularly towards his side. "Not 'deny', as much as you are trying to _'lull'_ yourself into thinking our reconsilliation is perhaps… a bad thing."

"I know what choice I'm making." Zuko puffed back at her. "It's my decision first and foremost. Mine alone."

"Of course, and you're doing it as… what, self-medication?" Her words swirled around him, prying at his emotions. "Yet, the downsides that come with the perks are what trouble you."

"Knock it off." Zuko bit back at her as his eyes carefully monitored her movements.

"What a tradegy..." She chided at him gleefully. "To think that through me, you finallly ended the quest to discover how to bend lightning, but at the cost of a loyal servant. Tell me, Zu-Zu, did his family weep? Did they curse your very name? Have they yet _dared_ call you crazy, dared to call you 'me'?"

Her comments stung like a million needles in his consience. She knew all too well when to apply the pressure to his wounds, and exactly where his wounds lie. She knew _him_ too well for that. Years of experimenting with mental abuse taught her much about Zuko, after all. She read him like a book.

"Is that it, then?" She continued her assault. She had found a weak spot, and she intended to exploit that very weakness to its full extent. "Maybe that's why you won't bend with me anymore?"

"Bending will continue once you've settled-" Zuko tried to cut her off mid-sentence, yet to no avail. She had tasted blood, and she wanted more.

"Scared you'll lash out at someone dear to you next time, is it? Or… maybe you're scared the rest of your pitiful friends won't trust your judgement, and lock me back up." Her eyes widened. It made more and more sense to her by the minute. "Don't worry, that smug little monk won't succeed. But you've got that all covered, _of course_ , haven't you?"

"What -are- you saying?!" Zuko lashed out at Azula, turning to face her. Although he tried to keep an eye out on her, she had made her way tactfully into his personal space.

"The thing you are trying to deny all this time is the idea that _you need me_." She leaned in towards him, trying to catch a glance at her final blow being delivered. Yet, her expected sadistic satisfaction was quickly traded in for misplaced curiosity, as Zuko averted his eyes, trying to regulate his breathing as his hands fumbled within his sleeves.

Zuko's eyes flashed as his hands finally gripped what they were seeking. "It is the opposite what you're trying to deny as well." He sneered back at her softly as he pressed something into her hands, before gently pushing her back as his other hand slid open the cell door.

"That's for you." His voice cracked painfully. "My staff will see to your transition to the palace."

Azula could not help but let a small gasp of amazement escape her lips. "Zu-Zu!" She yelled after him, but she was met with nothing but the echo of his footsteps fading into the silence.

She didn't get it. Normally spoken, he would have returned fire at her. That, or he would have broken down before her eyes. Was she in the wrong then? No, no, that wasn't it. She knew she was spot on with her line of thought. He was indeed afraid that his transactions would take place once more. Maybe… he was… right-.

"No…" She told herself, a slight waver in her tone. She wouldn't accept that, she wouldn't have to! She was always right about him! He was still little Zu-Zu, as predictable as ever. He didn't care about her, he was only using her as a means through which he would find so-called peace with himself. Killing that one guard did not prove a single thing. His poor lack of judgement of the situation had mislead him into killing the guard, just so he would still get to _use_ her.

Her hands still clutched the strange, pointy object he had carried with him to her cell. He delibirately hadn't given it to her straight away, if he even intended to give it to her at all. Maybe he had changed his conflicted mind at the last moment, but couldn't be bothered to rid himself of it before his visit. That, or it had to be something valuable to him.

Her fingers slowly unwrapped the cloth protecting the item, but as soon as she saw the gold rim sticking out of the top, the world had suddenly ceased to exist for Azula. Her fingers lost a hold, and the item fell to the prison floor, the crimson cloth floating after it. She couldn't even manage to percieve the clattering ring that echoed throughout her cell as she stared at it, bewildered at the thought of what Zuko had given her.

It was Roku's headpiece.

* * *

 ** _Substantially less material compared to the previous chapter, but these last two months were littered with exams and deadlines, plus a load of late-night shifts. I normally tend to write in the evening. ;)_**

 ** _Very grateful for the first handfull of reviews left, and I thought I'd adress the most recent one. HeroHearth: No worries, no crazy Zuko and no Aang as lover for Azula! Though, I can't promise other characters will have an intact sanity at the end of the story, or even be alive at the end._**

 ** _New material will come soon enough, once I work out the next few major plotpoints. Cheers!_**


	5. Chapter 5: A Sacrifice

_A month later…_

"Good- Very good, Zuko!" Iroh cheered from afar. He exchanged a quick glance with Ganak, approvingly, as they both observed Zuko and Druk… well…

"Play... Is he for real?!" Zuko grumbled to himself as he darted across the courtyard mid-air, somersaulting over Druk. The speed of his fiery launch was swept away as Druk's wings pressed the Fire Lord back, and sent Zuko off flying towards his Uncle and Ganak as he came around for a second swoop. Maintaining a feel of balance, Zuko bursted himself back to the stone floor inches before colliding with his newfound mentor, barely setting the poor man aflame as he tumbled for stable ground.

"The most excellent morning training a young man can get." Ganak mused as he poured himself a fresh cup of tea, masking a frail smile behind the trails of smoke.

"Can I stop yet?!" They heard Zuko roar as he evaded another head-long charge from Druk. The dragon, aging quite nicely, was still far from matured. It curved and coiled playfully up and down the courtyard, and at times it would seem as if the magnificent beast was intentionally trying to tackle the Fire Lord. Of course, it never would. Zuko was swift, and cautious. The Fire Lord observed the movements, and corrected himself when he found that Druk was close to outsmarting himself.

Thinking ahead was the key.

Ganak waved his hand, and Druk gently slowed his pace to a halt. "That will do. You may return to your Royal Quarters, for we have nothing left for today." He said.

The pair left Ganak to his morning tea as they trailed down the hillsides towards the palace. "It seems you're finally allowing yourself fun, aren't you nephew?" Iroh chuckled, Zuko only replying with a dull huff.

" _Fuuuuun_. Yeah, right." He scolded, tucking his arms behind his back.

"Oh, brighten up, Zuko, I was merely suggesting that these are the rare moments recently on which you _don't_ frown or pout or sigh." Iroh quickly followed Zuko.

"That's because my spare time is entirely deticated towards a relative which is hated and hunted across the globe, and at the same time still hates and hunts me!" Zuko snapped back at his Uncle without losing his pace. "And that, while I'm the only reason she's not _rotting_ away any longer!"

"Zuko, I understand your dificulties- please, slow down…" Iroh sighed deeply as his hands reached for his back. His physique was still perfect, yet old age affected the bone more than the muscle it seemed.

"Hrmpf." Zuko snarled, yet he did cut back his tempo. "It's just- Mai is right up my back about Azula constantly. She doesn't feel safe enough to let Izumi alone anymore. Hu Ban's _intimidation_ _nation_ comes knocking for justice every single bloody day, forcing my royal guards on edge twenty-four seven practically. Whispers go the Dai-Li are sending assassins one day, the next day the gossip goes Fire Nation citizens are openly suffering under inquisitors regarding the whereabouts of my sister…" His hands shoot towards his hair as a pained cry escapes his throat.

"You know we're dealing with these issues, Zuko."

"I know, but the biggest pain remains Azula!" Zuko replied. "I mean… I just can't get to her, okay?! I mean, sure… it's a start that she's wearing the crown I gave her. It's an heirloom, which technically does belong to her more than Izumi at this particular moment in time. But she seems to evade me. The rare encounters that we do share are mostly silent, or closely sheer against the border of violence, which I will _**NOT** _ allow in my own damn home- OWH, BY AGNI, DAMNIT!" Zuko cried out, not paying attention when kicking a large rock out of frustration.

"I know she will open up to you soon, Zuko. You must be patient." Iroh slowly said, extending a hand to help Zuko rise.

"I know, I know…" Zuko shook his head. His mind told him one thing, his heart told him another. Deep down, he was sick and tired for putting his head on the line. "I've… thought about some other activities with Azula which might force some kind of reaction from her, other than solemn silence-."

"You mean bending." Iroh quipped, although his grin wasn't as teethy or broad as a happy, joyful one. His tone reeled with concern, Zuko knew it. "I know you all too well, nephew."

It obviously pained Zuko greatly to admit to his Uncle his plan of resuming their bending practices. He had promised himself he would not spar with Azula once more untill her condition improved, and as he would have it the phycisians had informed him of gradual, slow progress being made. "You do." He whispered quietly as he stared at his feet. "It'll do me good to practice again."

"Of course it will!" Iroh boasted as he took a step towards his nephew. "Bending is at the very core of your being. It always has!" He emphasized as he took another step. "When you were exiled, your bending was defined by your rage, your misplaced passion for hunting the Avatar. And once you realized your wrongdoings and stepped onto a better path, your bending adapted to you. It strengthened you, _completed_ you. It is more than evident, Zuko."

"It is at her heart too." Zuko contemplated. He thought back to Azula practising in the Palace before his Father's eyes, her fingers perfectly stretched like two stiletto's as beautiful blue fire erupted from her tips. He remembered her fluent form, her incredible acrobatics, her controlled combustion. It reflected her character too, right down to her core.

"And that's why I am advising you not to resume your training." Iroh nodded softly. "Yet." He did add at the last second, trying to hint at Zuko.

Zuko shook his head as he looked off towards the Royal Palace. "I know… But, I mean- Take it this way. It's one of the few interests she will actually delve into. She's just as baffled as I am. And this time, I'll make sure our bending practice is properly overseen by some I trust. Someone capable of subduing both me as Azula, someone capable of protecting him or herself from any harm that could be inflicted by either of us." He mused as he tapped his chin, rather proud with his newfound idea.

"And who would you have in mind, might I ask?" Iroh stroked his beard, narrowing his vision upon Zuko. "There are few who can control Azula, let alone the both of you."

Zuko turned towards his Uncle, spinning on his heels as he leaned in. "We both know there's only one who can." He said with a rather amused look upon his face as the realisation of Zuko's idea dawned upon the venerable General.

"M-Me?! Well, Zuko- I..-" Iroh muttered hastly, rather confused and dumbstruck at the Fire Lord's proposal. It was unlike him to be at a loss of words, swimming in the discomfort of uneasy silence. A moment which Zuko gladly took full advantage of to close the deal between them.

"Then it is settled." He boasted heartfully, heading back towards the Royal Palace. "You'll be tasked with overseeing our bending sessions! I know she'll be just as _thrilled_ to see you as she was to see me again the first time! And don't worry, we'll find someone else to fullfill the utterly boring task of entertaining these foreign politicians in the meantime…"

"Prince Zu- I mean, Fire Lord!" Iroh cried out as he tried to match his nephew's eager strides. "Wait- _**BORING** **?!**_ Now just you-…!"

* * *

The sweat had been rinsed clean from his flesh, and the Fire Lord was resting outside atop his balcony overlooking the bustling city below. The lights flickered playfully against the dark night sky, rivalling the stars in their beaty and awe. He grasped his leather water flask, and swallowed back a good, refreshing gulp. Even though he took a lengthy bath, his skin was still boiling from the heat of his practice. He enjoyed a short spar with Azula at the end, under the watchful resting eyes of his Uncle. Red and blue flames had licked one another amidst the arena, but neither succesfully tasted human flesh. The two royal siblings remained unscathed by their exchange of blows.

He was, however, caught off guard as his sister appeared in silk night gowns beside him, folding her arms as she leaned in beside him. Out of sheer fright, he moved a step aside, creating a more comfortable, safe distance between the two. "I thought you'd head to bed after our session." He grunted, taking another sip of water.

"I didn't feel like it, _Zu-Zu._ " She smirked as she turned her head towards him, her bangs sweeping aside, making room for her deadly gaze. "Besides, I just had to give you atleast some props for your performance, however sloppy and uncoördinated it was."

"Hrm." Zuko heeded no call to her comments, unable to face her.

"Still…" She pouted her lips as her finger curled to her cheeks. "You've grown stronger. Is it _hate_ fueling your bending once more perhaps? Or some other vain emotion?"

Zuko decided not to dignify her cunning jabs with a respone, instead focusing his thoughts upon the city once more. His eyes scanned across the horizon, towards the pale moon beyond the hills towering above the housing. "I see you've taken a fond liking towards my gift." He commented dryly.

Azula's smirk turned into a rather foul, tasteless expression as her hand briefly touched the sharp curves of the Crown Prince's headpiece. "You could say that, yes. It does belong to _me_ , after all. By right." She closed in, trying to diffuse the unease between the two by invading his personal space. "You never did explain your foolishness."

Zuko sighed deeply, keeping himself weary of his sister. "It _does_ belong to you. Untill Izumi comes of age, you're next in line to the throne. You are my heir. No matter how crooked that might sound."

He didn't have much time to resume to his noctural sighting as he felt the sting of Azula's heel pounding away at his, sweeping the ground beneath him away. Falling straight onto his back, with a deep moan accompanying the air being blown from his lungs, he had no reaction to give as Azula's knees tightened around his chest, her left arm holding him pinned to the ground. "I guess all I'd have to do for a coup was to kill you right here, right now. Uncle won't be here to act as protector, will he now?" She hissed into his ear as the flames burning brightly in her right hand palm were closing in towards his scar.

Zuko, regaining his breath, edged his head towards Azula's, whispering slowly and surely as he tried to topple the weight crushing his body. "You… and I…. both know…. That won't happen!" He sputtered angrily back at her, his veins frustratingly and throbbing with blood and adrenaline as he adressed his sister.

"No, that won't." She gleefully and wickedly chuckled as she doused the flame inches from his eyes, causing Zuko to flinch nonetheless. "I'm smart enough to think that far ahead. Besides, who would I torment in the meantime? Everyone else isn't worth the trouble." She hopped off, snatching the flask of water for herself as Zuko scrambled himself back together, puffing heavily for a catch of air. Where were his damn guards anyway, he pondered, not quite placing how she even reached the balcony without a single alert being risen. He took another tentative moment to recollect his thoughts before adressing Azula once more.

"How are you liking your… _return_ , so far?" He grumbled, almost snarled, at her, still quite sore.

Azula had burrowed her hands into her sides, a bitter touch fluttering across her misleading lips as she spoke. "I fail to see the difference with the asylum." She blankly replied, making Zuko's hope wash away like pebbles against the tide. He hoped, or tried to believe, that her homecoming would do her more good than evil. Her thickle personality to unravel, untangle itself, and slowly regain its grip on reality. Of course, he was foolish to believe that this sort of natural healing wouldn't occur that fast, but some shred of guilted humanity craved for a hint of improvement or progress.

He furrowed his brows, frustrated with himself as he tried to deny the doubt starting to cloud his previous judgements. "Why did I even bring you here, then…" He replied, his voice void of conviction as his fingers dissaranged his wet hair even more. "You don't even _want_ to be here…"

"What was that, Zu-Zu?" Her words cut across the balcony with measured precision, cold as ever to see if Zuko would latch onto her bait, inviting his emotions to further lash out in disarray. "I _like_ it here."

"Don't lie to me." Zuko scoffed with a angered thrust of his hand, snapping away her insincerity. "We barely speak, we barely see each other. By Agni, you barely see anyone except the domestic guards I placed around your room!" His eyes glared back at her. "I can't even percieve whether your sane or bordering the opposite.." His words slowly faded away, leaving room for Azula to pounce.

"You're doing it again." She mused playfully, tapping her nails against the railing. "Denying your actions. Your thoughts. Your very _being_." Her remark seemed to have taken immediate effect, as Zuko tensed, biting his lower lip. "I can practically read your mind-"

"You always could." He tried to retort, to little avail.

" _Azula alwaaaays lies!_ " She chided him. "Pathetic, even coming through you. **_Her_ ** words still tie you down to this day. Your every move is evident to that, like how you tried to make me disappear-."

"If you don't recall." Zuko spat back angrily. "There's a boatload of people out there who are begging to see your head atop a spike."

A crease appeared upon Azula's forehead as her nails stopped tapping, instead sinking into the wooden board. "That's your defence? You locked me up for my own protection. Well, bra-freaking-vo, Zuko!" She highlighted her words with a sound clap of her hands as she fixed her amber eyes upon him. "You turned your back on me, just like the rest." She concluded, hissed at him with a hollow tone. "But I guess I should have expected as much from an imbicile like you. Simple minded decisions voiced by nothing besides from your own petty desires."

When Zuko failed to respond to her insults, she whiffed and folded her arms behind her night gown, turning towards the palace entrance. "And your blatantly ignorant ways continue to this very day. Nothing has changed, it seems." Her sigh pained with spite seemed not to even reach Zuko. "You're still consumed by the dictation of guilt, something you're incapable of shedding. Your shortcomings are your undoing, and that's _exactly_ why you deny your _need_ of me. It's the difference between what makes me strong, and you… _weak_."

As she walked off, removed from his sight, Zuko's head dropped towards the railing, sinking between the safety of his elbows as his eyes drifted outwards towards the city one last time. His mind swirled with deeply mixed reminiscence. She was right, he knew it deep down. He needed her back on his side. His conclusions lead to that single point, even though it contradicted all he had achieved thus far. He was sure that he had changed himself throughout the closing part of the Hundred Year War, yet this was evidence enough that he hadn't entirely. This was the last ties he had to his old self, a type of cord he could not detacht himself from.

His thoughts raced back to his dreams of Roku, and the ominous foreshadowing he had presented. For Zuko to be at long sought after peace, he had to restore and maintain the balance between him and Azula. But doing so would have to cost him _all_ that he held dear, in his mind. Regaining what bond they once briefly shared as young siblings stood against Mai, Izumi, Iroh… his family, his friends, his throne. It would even stand against the fragile peace that he tried to uphold throughout the entire world. The sacrifice he would have to make seemed nothing but insurmountable, yet at the same time it seemed paramount to him.

Fixing what was left in her usntable husk would surely break him. Mentally, physically… in any possible way. She would continue to be the cause of all his pain and suffering, and all she would ungratefully remember would be his betrayal towards her and their family, his constant miserable failings, his dire faults. Zuko would gain little to nothing from these burdens but his sister's recovery, if that was even remotely achievable.

"You can't possibly fathom all that I've done, and still am doing for you…" He sobbed with remorse to himself as his fist clenched.

* * *

The following night Zuko sat alone once more, conceiled from the world around him. Another turbulent, frustrating day had passed for him, filled with nothing but inner turmoil and annoying obligations. His council had assembled at his behest, which he regretted later, to try and further discuss the pending issues and extremely taxing tasks that awaited the Fire Nation in the wake of the War. It wasn't suprising to him than General Hu Ban took the lead and diverted the negotiations towards another bloodbath of a meeting. His rather carefully premeditated plans of trying to still the unease of the officials had been thwarted once more as the only discussable topic rested with Azula's possible conviction during a war trial, which he sadly had to defend with tooth and nail again. Tiresome was the only word he could imagine to describe the meddlesome state of affairs surrounding the political games amidst the conference rooms. He rubbed his forehead as he leaned back in his chair, closing his weary eyes for a moment.

The Earth Kingdom was adamant about persecution, while the Water Tribes stood at a rather troublesome wayward intersection upon the matter. Even though they had far less cause to convict Azula, they were not intending to back down from the matter. He often wondered if Yao and her fellow tribesmen were conspiring against him, trying to seek reason or motive to move against him. Then again, those doubtful thoughts were easily relayed as he tried to remind himself time and time again that his ceaseless efforts to aid the Water Tribes actually favoured his political position upon the matter of Azula. Gaining the support of the Water Tribes was crucial in preventing, or rather prolonging at this stage, of Azula's war trial. As long as he held a majority within the High Council, they would not touch his sister. Yao had not yet openly chosen any sides to root for, and thus Zuko would have to continue his stressfull attempts of 'pleasing' them untill she would sway for his pleas.

He was rather pleased with himself, though, a fraction of satisfaction barely standing out from the rest of his vortex of feelings. He managed to back down the Dai Li from the capitol, ending the unrest with his citizens. Furthermore, he had 'reminded' the Earth Kingdom Generals and goverment officials of their place within the High Council and their supposed aggression towards him, without directly threatening their authority. He had made a smart move, indeed.

Zuko stretched himself out, before leaning back towards his desk. His slender fingers cupped his cheeks, reaching all the way up to his hairline as his thoughts continued to cloud his mind. There were several unbroken seals on documents lying there, waiting for him to read. He wouldn't have time for those right now… atleast, for most of them. Most were just documentation or transcriptions, to keep track of all matters surrounding the High Council's affairs. He would rather stow those away in a large, dusty bookcase than read every tedious words upon the parchments.

His mind briefly touched upon Azula. Her condition had dropped since the previous night. The Royal Guardsmen had reported her morning seizure, describing her actions and words. Shin had been called upon swiftly to investigate what troubled Azula this time, and much to Zuko's regret Shin had heavily sedated her with medication, not the newly agreed upon herbal teas that uncle Iroh and the White Lotus had recommended as substitutes for the drugs. Shin had also told him _vividly_ what she was going through during her seizure, much to his disliking. He could keep himself from forgetting. She had been coiling and crawling around her room, tears streaming from her eyes as blue flames sprouted from her hands.

 _"She has sadly made another step back." Shin dipped his head as he tried tos hield himself from Zuko's judging, concerned eyes. "It appears she had another vision of her Mother, rivalling in severity as the ones she suffered before your visits tot he Asylum."_

 _"So it's uncommon for her nowadays?" Zuko raised his eyebrow, not sure whether to feel alarmed or curious at the present matter._

 _"Obviously, her return to the palace strengthened her mental fortitude." Shin continued. "Even if no one can physically observe such a change. Her attacks and withdrawals have decreased, as discovered throughout our research. A great improvement was the decrease in medication needed for her, which revealed to us that she was stabilising. But… today's event showed us we might have been impatient with our expectations."_

 _Zuko sighed deeply. "And now? What will you do?"_

 _Shin removed his glasses as he joined his fingers before his mouth. "I'm sorry, Fire Lord, but my experienced judgement tells me that she will need to resume medication. We'll be sure to try and lower the dosage weekly to try and see what level of stability she can handle. It is all up to her, in the end." The old man's eyes glimmered as he redirected the conversation towards Zuko. "And what about you, Fire Lord?"_

 _"Hrmn?" Zuko grunted, suprised at the sudden turn of discussion. "What do you mean?"_

 _"How about your mental state?"_

Zuko shook his head. Shin was just as worried about him as Azula. Still, Zuko felt comfortable in his remarks upon himself. His dreams had grown less… intense, but they still occured nonetheless. Sometimes it was Roku, vaguely preaching to him. Other times, they were nightmares about Azula, in any way imaginable. Only days when he and Azula, briefly as it may, had contact, would his sleeps go unharmed. Though, he was afraid that tonight would be another to dread. Another reason to postpone his rest, and press onwards, even if it meant that he would be exhausted tomorrow. He wasn't ready to face down another gruesome dream, filled with horror beyond his knowledge. He cursed to himself as he shook his head. He reminded himself that he should not let his worries get the upper hand over him, ever.

His curse suddenly made way for anticipation as he spotted one of the bottom letters bearing a different seal than a crimson flame. One that was bright orange with a silver and lightblue binding, bearing a symbol of three gusts of air. _"Aang."_ He cheerfully thought to himself as his fingers quickly snatched the letter from his desk. Moments later, however, after shredding apart the bindings and reading the content, he wished he maybe hadn't opened the letter. Now, he knew for sure he would not have any rest tonight.

 ** _"I found her."_**

The parchment softly zigzagged its way to the ground, released from Zuko's clutches as the Fire Lord could only oddly gaze into nothingness. There wasn't anything that he could do to stop the tears from flowing to his eyes, paired with frantic pants of disbelief. His entire being shook and roared with emotion, filling his entire being up with energy, barely bursting free in a tremendous shout of unbridled extasy.

Aang had done it… But… he was at an Air Temple, wasn't he? How could he have found her? HOW?! Even the combined might of the Fire Nation wasn't able to locate his mother of the span of months of searching the very ends of the world, and yet Aang had done the impossible. His eyes, crazed as they seemed, scoured each and every word upon the document and he quickly picked up the parchment from the floor. He couldn't believe it. Aang had descibed the exact location, the flight time… down to the last detail. A remote, uncharted island, far removed from civilization in the middle of nowhere. No wonder they never found her. This island was never known to society in the first place!

 _"Oh.. Aang! THANK YOU!"_ A breathless cry of joy escaped the young Fire Lord's lips, amidst the uncontrollable sobbing, as he sank back into his chair. His search was finally over. He would finally be able to bring her back home, to see her again!

And as sudden as the joy appeared, it vanished just as easily to replace an even bigger threat.

In his celebration, he had completely forgotten about Azula. Could he break the news to her? Her mental state would not be able to withstand the very idea, and aside from that there was no telling how she would react. Her intentions could be polar opposite of one another. Zuko believed, deep down, that there was a part of his sister which would be as happy as he was, but lurking at the other end of the equation was the possibility that she would murder their mother the instant they would lay their eyes upon one another. Azula still blamed him, amongst a long list of others, for her disappearance. For her neglect during her childhood years. For all the grief that she endured. For all the struggles she had to face, always being second to Zuko, if not doubting that she ever loved her daughter. If she even mattered to her.

It was a valid risk for him to take into account. The more he pondered, to his great fears, the more he convinced himself of the danger at hand. There was no possible reality in which Azula would stay her vengeance-filled hands. Given the chance, she would maim her, wound her, disgrace her, and ultimately kill her. It had been the driving force behind her very persona for as long as he could recollect. His nails broke the skin of his head, drawing a droplet of blood in the process of his anxious well of distraught mindset. He allowed himself to well up with fear and concern, for there was little he could do to stop himself from doing so.

On the far end of the spectrum, a grievous choice was thrown at Zuko's feet. If he was not to tell her right now, when would there be a time that he could? Moments ago, he just concluded the very fact that her recovery was a likelyhood instead of a promising, frutitious goal he would achieve, which revealed to him nothing else than the option of keeping his mother's existance a constant secret. So she couldn't been seen by anybody, expect him. And uncle Iroh, perhaps. The only one he could and would trust with this information.

 _"But that means she can't return home…"_ His mind raced as he winced, his body trembling. Fate is a cruel mistress. A new sacrifice to be made in order to regain their long lost bond and his sanity. He would gain Azula, but he would likely never be able to see his mother again. A powerless rage fed his muscles as he lashed out at his desk, his fist sinking into the ornate wood, finding no comfort nor relief, soon to make way for grief and sorrow once more. Was he willing to make that sacrifice?

 _"No"._

He couldn't sacrifice that. It was what he wanted for as long as he could remember. Then again, a lifetime of torment and pain would be a rather hefty price to live with. Plus, he would have to place Azula back into Asylum, and all his effort would have been for naught. He couldn't live with or without his mother, it seemed. He took a small moment to calm down and straighten out the facts and options. So he couldn't tell Azula right now, but he couldn't wait forever. And he couldn't ban his mother from his life, for he couldn't bear a lifetime of pain.

Little under an hour had passed as Zuko pondered upon the matter, walking back and forth across his room, tapping his chin, ruffling his hair, sighing ceaselessly. Untill he rested upon a final decision, a riskfull gamble, to life with. He would wait untill after the Winter Solstice and the completion of Roku's Fire Temple untill taking his leave for his mother. He would visit her once, a two day stay, in which he would assess her well-being and finally reconcile with one another. After that, he would make sure she was safe, provisioned, housed and all, before returning to the Fire Nation to resume his rule. Azula would know nothing, Iroh would safeguard the Nation in his absence.

And he would wait with telling Azula, untill the time was ripe to reintroduce his mother to her. He needed time to fix their bonds too.

* * *

 _ **Hello again! After a long enjoyed absence (since February of this year), I finally return to the site! I apologise for my leave for all who wondered if I abandonded the story for good, but I had quite the year behind me so far. I graduated high school (a second time, got my A-levels, woo!) and I was rewarded a promotion at work too, plus I recently enrolled into college. Life's going pretty swell!**_

 _ **I finished this chapter today in the span of a few hours, bursting with ideas as to where the story had to go. A sudden surge of hype the other week drew me right back into writing, specifically this story, and I seated myself this morning to find the words just typing themselves.**_

 _ **As for the content of this chapter: Seeing as I have been away for a long time, I thought I'd slot in a short in-depth breakdown of what I'm focusing on right now. A lot of Zuko's thoughts are (heavily) voiced throughout the three paragraphs, detailing what's going on in his mind. The essence of this is to highlight the importance of his decisions. As of the ending of A:tlA, we behold a Zuko who finally is ready to leave his past behind and make the right choices. In 'The Last Embers', I intend to explore to what length he is willing to let go of his past. Evidently, whether fate or a more human prospect caused it, he finds himself in the thickest mess to this date. His relationship with Azula and vice versa is slowly progressing, but the ultimate central thought I'm trying to convey throughout the chapter is that Zuko is 'trying' to fix their issuess during Azula's recovery. Azula, on the other hand, does not seem willing. Her very essence that makes her who she is, is that she's a mastermind with the keen ability to manipulate people. She knows Zuko, and she'll act on her insticts, no matter what he does. Zuko can fix her mental troubles, but he can't change what she is. And at this point, it is (maybe not so) clear to Zuko that she's still capable of her toolset. **_

_**As for Aang's letter and the resurgance of their mother, it will play a pivotal role between the two. Buuuuuuut I'm not going into detail on that quite yet. The next few chapters will unfold what her resurgance will imply for both characters, shaping their motives and beliefs, and ultimately make or break their bond.**_

 _ **That's all for now, I hope you enjoy the chapter. I can't promise when the next chapter will hit, but I'll be sure to lay the groundworks for them by the end of the week. Happy reading!**_

 _ **~InuNak**_


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